Why do I feel so bad after breaking up w
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Why do I feel so bad after breaking up w
| Mon, 03-26-2007 - 1:49pm |
Three weeks ago I broke up with my live in finace' because we were fighting so bad & he was calling me the nastiest names, as well as thretening to physically hurt me. He said he got his own place & he was leaving me when I went to work one day. Well after I felt really said I kicked him out & we continued contact for the last three weeks. This past Friday I left him a note explainign I loved him, but I wasn't 100% sure anymore & I needed space & time etc. Well then yesterday I was missing him so I asked him to come over & he speant the night & thenhe told me this mornign he had a three-some Friday night after the letter. I was totally shocked & disgusted so I told him I couldn't see him anymore & he put this big guilt trip on me about how he moved from another state to be with me, and how much he loved me & no one will love me like he did & that he needed attention from those girls friday after I left the note.
HE's very mad at me and I feel bad but I don't think we're right for each other even though he has other good qualities his bad ones outweight the good.
I eneded it for good but still feel bad because he's made me feel that I've made his life go down hill since th ebreak-up. HE's promised & apoligized but I still feel the damage is done & shoudl move on for the best interest of myself. Why do I feel so bad though? I need to know how to get over the lonely nights especially because thats when I think of all the good times & then I want to call him which I know isn't fair or right. Please help with some good advice which I need desperatly.
HE's very mad at me and I feel bad but I don't think we're right for each other even though he has other good qualities his bad ones outweight the good.
I eneded it for good but still feel bad because he's made me feel that I've made his life go down hill since th ebreak-up. HE's promised & apoligized but I still feel the damage is done & shoudl move on for the best interest of myself. Why do I feel so bad though? I need to know how to get over the lonely nights especially because thats when I think of all the good times & then I want to call him which I know isn't fair or right. Please help with some good advice which I need desperatly.

Hi curlygrl30 -
Everything you feel is normal.
Here's some things to read to help you:
How To Get Over Your Breakup
You feel bad because you have "Dumper's Remorse" (read It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken, page 131).
Let me see if I have this right:
He called you names
He threatened you
You ask for time off and the next day sleep with him
He THEN confesses that he slept with not one but TWO girls less than 24 hours after you broke up with him? (Hopefully he used protection, too)
All the BS that he's feeding you about 'not finding someone else' and that 'no one will love you like he did' - it's all LIES intended to make you FEEL BAD. This guy is a NO GOOD S.O.B. You need to run FAR and FAST away from him.
Start a NO CONTACT policy immediately and get this guy out of your system, for good.
You are strong, you are smart, you are funny, you are kind - you are NOT some man's doormat, nor should you be threatened or called names. LET YOURSELF BE MAD ABOUT THAT! Make a good list of 'pros and cons' of the relationship - I BET the CONS outweigh the PROS by a lot.
Hang in there - you'll be fine...it takes time.
Good advice: