how to stop torturing myself...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2007
how to stop torturing myself...
4
Wed, 09-05-2007 - 10:14pm

Would you please tell me how to stop myself from checking ex's facebook and his newly set dating profile...

My heart is aching so much!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2007
Wed, 09-05-2007 - 11:18pm
delete him from your friends list. simple as that.
- There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will. So don't worry about people from your
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 09-06-2007 - 2:00pm

Welcome to the board gal_luckybamboo,


Deleting him is a good start.


It's about self-control.... you gotta be disciplined, find something else to do, write an UNSENT letter to him about how you feel about facebook, etc. burn it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2006
Thu, 09-06-2007 - 4:21pm
its been a whole year since my ex and i broke up. I'm afraid I'm also guilty of check his myspace and facebook. =( Most of the time i'm very self disciplined, but sometimes i relapse. =(
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2007
Fri, 09-07-2007 - 11:53am

As a past cyber stalker, I know how hard this is. For the three months post-breakup I stalked. I read his local paper online (he is in it a lot for work); I checked the website for a professionals group he is in that has details on meetings and photos of events; I read his company's website that shows what things he'd be doing/attending. I did it a lot, several times a day and then I just got sick of it. Month four post-breakup I've stopped it all. My ex and I are not in touch. It was a sad, amicable break, but it has been cold turkey, hence my desire to find out anything I could about him. But, he's moving on cleanly without looking back, kind of like I don't exist. I've tried to do the same and stopped checking to see what he was doing any way I could.

You may need to just do it a ton and then realize it will change nothing and you're better off not knowing what is going on.

It's hard -- it's a soft addiction. Try it out for two days, restrain for two days, and then see how you feel.