Saying it here, instead of to him

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2007
Saying it here, instead of to him
6
Wed, 09-26-2007 - 5:08am

Tina Marie

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2007
Wed, 09-26-2007 - 7:31am

Hi, Tina.

Anger is normal. Good for you for posting here instead of telling him!

I'm not in as much pain as I usually am when I come here, either...so I think that means we're both doing something right.

Hang in there!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2007
Wed, 09-26-2007 - 11:26am

**I am usually the one that gets used and manipulated, because I am so nice to people. But, this feeling of wanting him to suffer is strong (and scary). Is this normal?**

I used to be like that also, but not anymore. I think it is normal for a while. But it does get better as time goes on, as long as you don't let it consume you. Its been 5 1/2 months since the breakup for me, and just a couple weeks ago, I received an email, and for a couple of hours, I wanted to pinch his head off and spit down his neck, but that did pass. The next day I was back on track with myself, and it just continues to get better. Keep writing unsent letters, or whatever you have to do to get it out of your system. Keep your chin up and your head held high. Good luck

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Wed, 09-26-2007 - 12:34pm

Keep writiing Tina..... even on paper then burn it, daily if need be.





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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2006
Wed, 09-26-2007 - 12:39pm

According to the Kübler-Ross Grief Cycle, there are five steps to recovering from grief:


Shock, Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Testing


Anger is the 3rd step or phase and I think that is where we start to make a recovery.


It seems that most of you state that you started a viable recovery (realization that its not YOU, but instead is HIM or whatever the case may be).


Good luck in your future healing!


jim


edited to add that I think the best thing we can do to 'communicate' things to someone after a heartbreak is to be seen happy with someone new!




Edited 9/26/2007 12:42 pm ET by j_o_brown

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2007
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 4:22am

I realize that I cannot tell him these things, but I wish someone would.

Tina Marie

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 12:12pm

Hi Tina,


I understand how you feel.