She Called

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2007
She Called
10
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 3:27pm
My gf of five years broke it off a couple of months ago -- we had some contact initially (to tie up lose ends and what not).
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
In reply to: rossjack
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 4:16pm
read or download in itunes, "it's called a breakup becaues it's broken." hopefully this will help you get through the rough phase of wanting to contact her. you should NOT feel bad about not contacting her. I hate to say it, but you guys already broke up, so it doesn't matter what she "thinks" of you, and if she was a decent person at all, she would understand why you need this. good luck!!!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
In reply to: rossjack
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 4:33pm

Hi rossjack,


Can we please remember that she was the one who broke up with you?

Myspace Codes

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2007
In reply to: rossjack
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 4:39pm

I know you want to talk to her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2007
In reply to: rossjack
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 4:49pm
I
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rossjack
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 5:36pm

The way I've handled that issue in the past is to ask my exes to ONLY contact me if they are serious about getting back together.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2007
In reply to: rossjack
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 6:36pm
Thanks all for the advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
In reply to: rossjack
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 6:48pm

I just dont feel right ignoring her and letting her figure it out for herself but if thats what people think is the right thing to do I may have to do it.


If you chose to keep "helping her out" then you are going to be in in for a long and painful ride. YOU are not responsible for how she thinks and feels. You are only responsible for how YOU think and feel. People that want people back are much more persistent I think then just one or two phone calls post break up. I wouldn't do anything unless she calls again, then do what I think Sheri said which is to politely say that you wish to be left alone unless thier is serious discussion about how to mend things. You give this girl way to much power, which I know is hard, because I was in a 5 year relationship too. But please try to focus on YOU right now.

 

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rossjack
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 7:20pm

What I've done in the past is to

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2007
In reply to: rossjack
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 2:49pm

Here is the problem I am having now...


I have not contacted her in anyway (nor do I really want to) because I feel like it will just fuel her belief that I will always be there as a backup plan or something.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rossjack
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 3:28pm

It seems to me that this "problem" is easily solved by sending her an email making your position clear.