i did it again
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| Wed, 01-02-2008 - 4:38pm |
I have been posting on here about the difficult time i am having, how 2 weeks post breakup i am left with so many questions and thoughts i dont know what to do. last time i broke NC, my ex was not very nice to me. he said he was trying to move on, and didn't want to see me, and wasn't going to call me, and didn't think it would help to talk about the tough time we were having because his mind had been made up. I tried to sit with that, then new years came and went, nary a happy new years from him (not that i expected it).
this morning again as always i am having a tough day. I texted him just now "i miss you. alot. you are the first thing i think about before i even open my eyes in the morning". he didn't respond. I knew he wouldn't. it just makes me feel terrible, but what is worse is it makes me paranoid. i feel like i did something, unsure about what, and he is so angry at me, since i never really understood the breakup to begin with. ugh

hi talksthetalk,
I may not say the right thing here, but I gotta say what I think.
you are not going to get the answers you want from this guy.
I understand you are having a tough time. I am on my third week and i to have no closure or answers or clarity for that matter on what happen. But calling this guy over and over again, sending text messages that say I miss you and constantly looking to him to answer the question "WHY" is not going to help you ehre.
You have to find a way to pull yourself together and STOP contacting him. He has already expressed to you that he doesn't want to talk. And you need to respect that it is over and he is taking the route that he is taking.
Stop looking to him for answers and start looking within yourself.
Contacting him is making things worse for you. It is making you frantic and paranoid and anxious and making you question yourself. If you just completely jump into NO Contact then you will no longer feel like you do right now because you reached out and he is not reaching back.
Do you have any friends who can support you through this? you need to call them/text/email them instead of him. Journal, go for a walk and just feel the feelings. Please, protect yourself and your heart and stop contacting him.
For you...
Breaking the Compulsive Calling Cycle
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlbreaking&msg=20822.1
Hi,
I just wanted to write to you because I feel your pain.
Jacki
153.2 / 152.2 / 120
PLEASE read, It's called a breakup because it's broken," or "it's called a breakup, not a breakdown." They will really help you see what you are doing as damaging you and your self-esteem. there are many other great books too but I read both of these myself and found they were both helpful AND funny! Get off this rollercoaster!
Sweetie, he's not angry at you (although he may be annoyed at the continued contact when he's made clear he doesn't want to talk to you)--he's just trying to move on.
Talks,
We have so much in common, its unreal.
You can email each other from your profiles, just click on the person's name and it'll direct you.
an article you might find helpful:
http://gettingpastyourpast.wordpress.com/2007/12/29/1229-tftd-when-the-person-you-love-doesnt-love-you/