I feel stupid ...

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2004
I feel stupid ...
5
Mon, 04-21-2008 - 1:09am

I feel like a fool. The last conversation I had with the guy I've been dating for six months, the guy that I slowly let myself have major feelings for,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-10-2008
Mon, 04-21-2008 - 2:55am
commitment phobic it sounds like. he will come on strong initially then slowly pull away as you open up more. sounds like he got scared after he realized the relationship was about to become more serious, and skipped out. there is really no rational explanation for why people do this. my ex did the same thing. it leaves you feeling lost and blindsided. you should read he's scared, she's scared. it really helped me sort through the questions i had in my head. i hope you feel better and try and get out, talk to a friend, family member, anyone who you can tell your feelings to about the breakup. also, let yourself grieve naturally... just cry, it helps.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 04-21-2008 - 1:14pm

Welcome to the board nyc_rocks,


I can't explain the behavior - it could be anything, including commitment issues.... sorry you are going through this.


Relationship Grieving Process - http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlbreaking&msg=22985.1


Grieve for what might have been, for what could have been, for what you hoped would have been.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2003
Tue, 04-22-2008 - 9:14am

Your boyfriend was gutless. There's no law against breaking up at any point in a relationship, but this type of vanishing act (which robs the dumpee from having closure) shows an extreme lack of character. That's what I would focus on if I were you. He revealed his true character to you, and it's not something you want or need in your life. It sucks, I know.

Freelance

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2004
Tue, 04-22-2008 - 8:02pm
Thank you all so much for the advice and kind thoughts. I'm still hurt, sad, confused, disappointed ... but I'm also on the road to recovery. I won't be swimming in the dating pool for a long time, but right now that's ok with me. I'm listening to a lot of angry break up songs and talking to my best friend several times a day, so I know I'll be okay:) I can't thank you guys enough! I felt so lost and alone. Thank you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2006
Wed, 04-23-2008 - 9:59am

NYC,


I had a similar situation as yours; Mine was all about commitment at first, he was always the one pushing forward, but then he just gave up. It leaves you saying "What the hell!"


Sounds like you have an awesome support system :) Go Girl! :D


Katie