Is this an impending break up?
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| Tue, 05-06-2008 - 4:07pm |
My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 18 months. That's the longest he's ever been with any girl. :) His longest before me was only 6 months, and he mentioned a while back getting "anxious." I told him I understood, and wanted to help him overcome that anxiousness. The truth is, I love him unconditionally and would still adore him as a friend even if he left me, and I love him enough to let him go if he needs to. We talked it out, and he says that he wants to be with me, and doesn't want anyone else. He says he doesn't know why he's confused, but wants to stay together.
He will tell me he loves me, and I know for a fact he is not cheating. But lately, he's been acting a little strange. Suddenly, everything I have said "hurts" him somehow. He admitted to looking at pictures of naked women on the internet when I was gone (I go to school across the country from him, but the distance doesn't bother us too much) and he couldn't have me. I told him I didn't mind at all right then and there. He later sends me an email saying "you shouldn't be annoyed at it." I had told him it was fine...this is just one pointless example of a behavioral pattern I've been seeing for about three months now. He'll get a little distant, and then when I call him on it he happily comes back, but will not explain the "absence." When questioned, he responds "I'm a guy." Always.
He'll take issue with stupid things, but then when I let it go (I pick my battles, it's usually dumb stuff so I just give him what he wants), he'll act sad even though I let him have his way. It's as if he's purposely being impossible to please. He did mention that his friends are telling him (none of them have met me) that he's "not ready for a steady right now," and that he should "sow his wild oats." He doesn't seem to want to, but I'm getting worried.
Should I be there for him and try to help him through some "commitment anxiety"? Or should I be worried that he's going to wander away?
Help...

Thing about folks with "commitment anxiety" is that the more you
You said you are the longest relationship he has had.