Coping with husband's new EMT job

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2006
Coping with husband's new EMT job
2
Wed, 10-11-2006 - 10:30am
Hi there. New to the Boards. Looking for information, advice, anything really on how wives cope with husbands who work in professions like EMS, Fire, Police, etc. My husband has worked an 8-5 Monday-Friday job since we've been together and now he has joined the local County EMS as an Emergency Medical Technician. He works all nights, so completely opposite of my schedule as I work 8-5 M-F as always. Sometimes, it may be 3 days that I go without even seeing him b/c of work. We had plans on Sunday and they forced him to pull an OT shift. I love him and am proud of him in his new career, but am having a hard time dealing with the schedule. We have been married for almost 5 years and he has always been there, now all of a sudden, he's not. I'm trying to get used to it, but am having a hard time and we have started fighting about it. I also worry about the women he works with. He works very closely with women at the station and hospital and I have felt a little jealousy creeping in. I trust him and he makes every attempt to let me know he loves me, but am just all mixed up right now emotionally. He has offered to quit the job if it began interfering in our marriage, but I could never ask him to do that. He loves having a job that actually makes a difference. I've thought about trying to get into the medical field myself so we can talk the same language or work nights or whatever, but not sure if that's the right road to take or not. Can anyone out there relate to me and offer any advice?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Wed, 10-11-2006 - 12:06pm

We've actually got a Firefighters' Wives (http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-rlfirefighte) board as well as a Cop Wives (http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-rlcopwives) board. You might want to check these out to see if either of them have advice for you.

Best of luck!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 10-11-2006 - 10:14pm
Welcome to the board, Allyg8r ~ I'm glad cm-corrine posted the links to the firefighter and police boards for you.


To my knowledge there's no one on this board who's spouse or s/o works in that kind of profession, but I think we can offer you some help in dealing with the change of not seeing him, etc. But first, I have a few questions that will help know where you are so we'll know what direction to head:

  • How long has he been working as an EMT?
  • What are the two of you doing to deal with the time apart?
  • It sounds like this situation has really caused some problems between you (evident in that he volunteered to quit), can you tell us a little about the problems it's caused?
  • Do you work outside the home?
  • Where do you think your jealousy feelings come from? Have you been jealous, suspicious or concerned about infidelity before? Has he been unfaithful in the past, or have you had boyfriends or others in your life who were unfaithful?


    Thanks in advance for your answers, I'll be checking back for your response ~






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