How can i trust my boyfriend?
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How can i trust my boyfriend?
| Fri, 01-05-2007 - 7:31pm |
I've been with my boyfriend for two years and living with him for a year and half. Before we moved in together we did the whole long distance thing. Which was pretty hard. Before we moved in together he seemed to be pretty honest with me. But now that we are living together its kind of hard to believe anything he tells me and i'm startingto believe that what he told me before was not true. He's been calling other girls and then when i confrunt him about it he says that he just called them to say hi. But the crappy part about the whole thing is that he does it while i am in school. He says he won't do it any more, but i find that hard to believe. So what would any of you girls do?

Why do you believe that his phone calls are inappropriate? And why do you believe that what he told you before is untrue?
We'll be checking back for your answers ~
~ cl-2nd_life
"Experience is what you get
When you don't get what you want"
~ Author unknown
"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"
The fact that he makes these calls but says he doesn't want you talking to other guys is pretty concerning. It says your relationship isn't equal, that he doesn't hold himself to the same "rules" he holds you to. That indicates he might not see women as being equal to men, and if that's the case, he'll always think he's entitled to do things that either aren't appropriate at all, or aren't fair as you'll not be entitled to the same actions.
You're also right that if he'll lie to you about this, he'll lie to you about anything. That leaves a lot of concern and a lot of lack of trust.
Have you talked to him about these issues? Not just the fact that he makes the calls, but that he does it behind your back, has lied about making them and does it despite the fact that he doesn't want you to talk to men. If so, what does he say about it? Does he offer a resolution?
~ cl-2nd_life
"Experience is what you get
When you don't get what you want"
~ Author unknown
"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"
::but along with that he let out his secret that he had called the other girl that i didn't want him talking to. I have told im about all this and all i get is i'm sorry and t will never happen again. Which i'm getting pretty tired of hearing.
Sounds like you have the answer to your question "How can i trust my boyfriend?" You can't. He's got a double standard - it's ok for him to call and talk to girls, but you aren't allowed to talk to other guys. My guess is that he LOVES there attention and/or he will have another relatonship to jump into should something happen between the two of you.
I hope you make the right decision for you.
Carrie
~ cl-2nd_life
"Experience is what you get
When you don't get what you want"
~ Author unknown
"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"