Fed up with getting stood up

Avatar for incognito_mosquito
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Fed up with getting stood up
3
Sun, 01-23-2005 - 3:31am

I just got stood up for about the fourth time tonight by this guy I've been seeing for about a month. I told him I wasn't interested in trying to continue with it because I just don't have alot of free time to be making plans and then winding up with nothing to do. Now he's upset, saying hs daughter was sick and there was nothing he could do and feels I'm being unreasonable.

I understand that especially when you have kids things happen, because I am a single mom myself. But somehow I manage to meet people when I say I will, and go to alot of trouble and inconvenience to do so (hiring a sitter, taking her over there, re-arranging my schedule to suit theirs) so when I get stood up and I have to call *them* to find out what's going on it doesn't exactly make me interested in continuing the relationship.

Last Saturday he cancelled because he was sick. I had talked to him that morning but when 8 o'clock rolled around and he was nowhere to be found I called and he said he was sorry he hadn't called but he had been feeling bad since that morning and it had gotten alot worse. So I was sad, but I said I understood and would like to try to see him next weekend. (Keep in mind he had already cancelled on me twice before due to something or another popping up with hs daughter, but we had managed to get together another time.) Well today he was supposed to call me when he got up and come over so we could go to a matinee. I called once around 2 pm and got his voicemail. Called again around four and he said he was sorry he hadn't called but his daughter was sick and he had to take care of her.

I feel bad because I know it's to his fault that his daughter got sick, but I spent the entire weekend alone doing nothing because of him and one other person standing me up. I've just lost my patience with waiting for him to finally be able to see me. Am I being unreasonable here? I feellike even though it's not his fault she got sick he could have at least called me sooner so I wasn't waiting around all afternoon for him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2004
Sun, 01-23-2005 - 8:20am

I'd feel the same as you. HJNTIY. So don't call him anymore. He could have made it right so many ways but didn't. Plus, he has a history of doing this. His chances have run out IMO.

NEXT!

Lisa




Edited 1/23/2005 8:20 am ET ET by lisapeake
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2004
Sun, 01-23-2005 - 9:40am

Hi there -

I'm new here, but I just wanted to say that if he's making you unhappy, he's not worth another minute of your time. If he says he's going to call, he should call...you would call him if your child got sick! I know that if my daughter was sick, and I had a date planned, I would make a two minute call to cancel. Let him go, because he sounds like trouble.

sg63

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2005
Mon, 01-24-2005 - 1:34pm
I kinda wonder what would posess someone to go on a first/second/third date and begin something they know they have no intention of finishing? Am I being closed minded? I usually have a pretty good idea if I like someone and want to spend more time with them. If he likes you, yes i know the whole HJNTIY stuff, but he must on the most basic level LIKE you, otherwise he wouldn't bother (I hope) I just dont get the point in stringing people along, wont it be so much harder the deeper it gets?