Had a first meeting . . . .

Avatar for bluebird1234
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Had a first meeting . . . .
3
Wed, 01-26-2005 - 10:56pm
and I'm totally on the fence as to how I feel about this guy. I did agree to a second date, and we talked a bit on-line afterward, but my first impressions of him were not that great. Do you go with your gut (I know, you SHOULD), or give it another chance, just to be sure? The guy was nice and all, we've been chatting for about 4 weeks off & on, but the attraction was just not all the way there! I'm pretty sure the picture he had on Match, and the one he sent me, were NOT from last summer, as he claims, more like 4 or 5 summers ago! And, hate to say this, he's balding in back! Not a huge turnoff, but just another little thing . . . . and he smokes, and I quit 5 years ago, and, and, and! - what do I do? I sometimes wonder if I overanalyze too much in the beginning, or should I go with my initial gut reaction?!?!?!? He really seems to like me, too. Want's to get together again soon, we're going to set something up in the next couple of days . . . thoughts?
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-27-2005 - 10:38am

I just went through this after a 2nd date...although my issues had to do with compatiblity, not attraction (I was attracted to him). I ended up passing on a 3rd date and I feel good about that decision...as I posted here, I made up my mind when he called me and I got a pit in my stomach at seeing his number on caller ID...I totally had NO desire to talk to him!

I also have a somewhat similar situation with a guy I had a first date with this past Saturday. I really liked him as a person; I'm just not sure about attraction (he's VERY thin and that's not a body type I'm attracted to as a general rule). But I'm going to go out with him again because he's just so interesting to talk to and I hope we will at least be friends if the attraction issue doesn't go away.

So...do you *like* him? Do you enjoy talking to him? If so, go out again. Even if you end up as friends, that's not a bad thing!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2003
Thu, 01-27-2005 - 5:41pm
give it two more dates. you should know by then. if you had a good time, go out agai. end of story. the deal breakers you mentioned may not seem so important after another date/two. or they will. but i give guys 3 trys if I had a good time. even lukewarm time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 01-29-2005 - 12:39am
I wouldn't. I met several lukewarm ones and didn't go out twice with them. In my case, if there's no chemistry at first sight, it never happens.