I did it

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2003
I did it
5
Thu, 02-10-2005 - 2:25am

Well, if you remember from my other post about David (New and going crazy) I left off that I was going to ask him out.

Tonight was the first I talked to him in a couple days. He again was distant (preoccupied with IM's which I never noticed when we talked before). I said my good nights and turned off my pc. "Tomorrow I'll do it" I said to myself but the more I thought about it I realized I say "I'll do it tomorrow" with too many things in my life so I turned my pc back on. He was still online so I went for it.

In a previous conversation he had said something about me coming to visit him. So I said, "If you are still serious about me coming to visit, are you busy Saturday?" His reply, "I am but I have to work" and that was all that was said besides a couple of the worried smilies that he added.

If he's not waffling would he had suggested another day or should I just take it for what it is, that he had to work?

This is the first I've asked anyone out so I'm not sure how to take the answer.

Thanks again,
~Krista

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
In reply to: lunarshadow
Thu, 02-10-2005 - 7:57am

This is the best email that I can suggest sending. I received it a few weeks ago and though it beautifully put the ball in my court and stated what she expected. Very smooth without being pushy or long winded:

Hi xxx
....blah, blah brief two sentence chit-chat...
I will let you contact me when you think you can get away for a little bit. It would be fun to meet you.
Have fun.
xxx

Then that's it period, end of story. Exclamation point. Any email that does not provide a date to get together goes to the trash.

I believe you are wasting your time with someone who is never going to meet you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2004
In reply to: lunarshadow
Thu, 02-10-2005 - 12:18pm

I never saw the original post, but based on what you wrote here, I have to agree with LG.

He may really ahve to work, but it would have been nice if he suggested another day. You took the initiative (good for you!) and now he kows you're interested. Leave it up to him now. I wouldn't persue things further.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
In reply to: lunarshadow
Thu, 02-10-2005 - 4:03pm

Yeppers Lunar,

You are "done", stick a fork in you...I have a rule about two points of contact. I will call once, email once and them I am forbidden to touch any means of communication again! Looks Wayyyyy too needy.

As for asking him out, good for you!, but you have to move on and let Him catch up with you now; he knows you want his time. I think he would have said something besides "I have to work", but then, men do not think Like we do!

Let it lie and roll on, wink more, send more initial emails to other prospects...let him be at the starting gates, but not out of the blocks! Old Japanese proverb I Live by:
"Do nothing and have Nothing to regret"--especially good when you have had some wine and want to contact a man late at night....no, no, no Scahlett...tommorrow is anutha' day!

Truly,
Cupcake

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2003
In reply to: lunarshadow
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 4:59pm

Thanks all.

I no longer have intentions of persuing this any further than simple online conversation now and again. That was our third try, three strikes you're out and besides, he made clear lastnight to use "friends" a couple times as a huge exclamation point and that's fine with me. Actually, the fact that I even asked wasn't mentioned at all, guess he didn't need to with his "I consider you a close friend" statement.

Sooo...Next! *wink*
~K

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
In reply to: lunarshadow
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 5:46pm

Hi K,

For the record, anyone who 'lobotomizes' an issue and just ignores it like it was not said has NO integrity, and that shows that you can do Mucho better than him! Were he to have Any grace, he could have said "I appreciate your invitation, but no thank you"..as I say, we women can Handle the truth,no need to be rude!

Ding! next...on to bigger and better for You!

Truly,
Cupcake