Need advice quick!
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Need advice quick!
| Tue, 03-29-2005 - 3:58pm |
OK, you all might remember R, the guy that I have been out with a few times who I met in RL. He has been kinda wishy-washy on me and seems to be kinda into me but not really. He and I are both big fans of Lost so he has asked me over tomorrow to watch the new episode and have dinner. I'd like to go and know that if I can keep my expectations that this is just a fun thing and probably not going to go anywhere that I will be fine. But it is the first time I have been to his house and we also haven't gone out in a couple weeks. It seems like every time I have given up on him, he'll show back up and ask me out. I honestly am not expecting it to go anywhere, so is it OK to just go and have fun and make out with him? Cuz we probably would. :-)

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Of course it's "ok", in the broad, moral sense...but only you can decide if it's "ok" for YOU. Personally, I know myself well enough to know that I'd be really upset if we made out and then he went back to being his old wishy-washy self, so I wouldn't do it. But if you KNOW you will be ok with it and not have any expectations, then go for it! Be honest with yourself, though.
Sheri
If you can live with yourself in the morning, what the hec'...although I don't think he invited you over just for dinner/LOST/and makeout session..sounds like a booty call.LOL..
The real question here is..do you want to miss risk missing ANY part of this weeks' LOST..as it is a new episode that all have been waiting for over two weeks for??? LOL
good luck with whatever decision you make..have fun..only go thru this life once...
I know - that's what "concerns" me is that it is a booty call. He'll get making out but no "booty" from me! LOL - it's been a while, but I am a relatively good girl. But good point on only living once. I really enjoy his company and we always have fun together. He is just not looking for anything serious right now and as long as I know that, I am not one to try to change his mind - BTDT and I know better. But if I enjoy being with him, I might as well, right? All I'd be doing otherwise is sitting on the couch watching with my cat!
But I do think that we would watch the whole episode without missing any - it's been almost a month!! Usually we talk the day after the episodes to analyze them anyway so this way we could do the analysis in person... ;-)
Go ahead but so help me if I see yet another message that starts...
"I know you guys said it was a bad idea to bang the hot gas station attendant in the washroom - but I went ahead and did it -- so does anyone know why he hasn't called me yet? Men are such losers."
>>if I find a guy that I like being with, I figure why should I deny myself that?<<
Have you READ "He's Just Not That Into You" or not?
Because you sound like EVERY SINGLE GAL in that book, rationalizing like mad to make excuses about why it's okay to date THIS guy.
"so he doesn't call me and he's wishy washy, but if I like being with him then I should just go ahead and do that on those few occasions when he gets down the list and bothers to call me, and why should I deny myself that?"
Blech. Watch "Lost" alone or with a girlfriend or with BOB if you've got to work something out (if you know what I mean).
If this guy is being all wishy-washy and takes weeks in between dates and is obviously not into you, NOBODY here is going to excuse or sympathize with you if/when you complain about him later. You are a smart woman and YOU KNOW BETTER.
It certainly sounds like he's not into you.
If you're really a woman who can shut off her emotions and just make out or have sex or anything in between with a guy who you KNOW isn't into you, cool, go for it.
But frankly, it certainly sounds to me as though you ARE settling; you're settling for some minor amount of smooching with a guy that (it sounds like) isn't really into you enough to bother trying to get together more frequently.
Ah..just GO!..what the hec'...sometimes this informal, hanging sort of dates with someone's company you enjoy are stepping stones to something bigger and better..maybe not necessarily with that particular person but leads you down the road to *THE* particular person..
You know what the deal is..I can tell from reading your posts you are not someone who lives like the ostrich..enjoy his company..enjoy the show..and perhaps..bring a big stick..just in case he gets fresh..LOL
Save the booty for a Saturday nite date..so much better I find..don't have to get up in the morning for work...must admit..I am a tad jealous..lordy, its been so long..
Have fun...
Nope, I understand what you are saying and even what NGOL is saying. I know that this guy is not incredibly into me. But like I said too, I don't expect this to turn into something more than maybe just a FWB thing. I've stopped worrying about whether or not he calls or emails. If he does - great. If he doesn't no skin off my nose. With him, I definitely have the attitude of "this might be the last time I hear from him". If so, so be it. We are still friends in at least some sense and enjoy a lot of the same things as well as hanging out together. If we stopped hanging out tomorrow, no big deal.
Mwaahahaha - but now I'll know where he lives so I can hunt him down and stalk him! JUST KIDDING!
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