I think we had THE talk!
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I think we had THE talk!
| Sat, 07-16-2005 - 10:06pm |
My motorcycle guy called this afternoon and we ended up talking for close to 3 hrs! I think, in a round about way, we kinda had the exclusive talk. He had called me last night and left a message saying "oh, you must be out with your boyfriend" (jokingly)..I was on the other line actually... so I told him today that that only guy I was interested in seeing lived 3 hrs away (meaning him!!) then a few minutes later he told me about a girl he works with that likes him and I said (jokingly) "far be it for me to be the one to tell you not to go out with anyone else!!"..to which he replied "I'm not attracted to her...I'm attracted to you!!"...then he (again jokingly) said "oh, I guess I'm not worth fighting for huh!!" LOL ...It really was all very cute! I'm either crazy about him or just plain crazy!! :-) But I do know I just can't wait to see him again and again and again!!

but it is the closest thing I've gotten to the talk in almost two years!! And I've gotten past dates #2 and #3...and he actually STILL wants to see me :-) That's huge for me right now! We also talked about our profiles on match and he said "yours isn't on there anymore right?" and I said "nope" (I recently hide my profile but my subscription isn't up until Sept) and he said he guesses he has to email them to stop his subsription because he doesn't know much about it. I told him he had to actually log in and cancel. His profile has said "active over 3 weeks ago" since April when I first contacted him. I haven't had a guy this interested in me in awhile and sometimes I don't know what to do!! I'm just letting go and seeing where it takes me :-)
If you both are talking about taking down profiles that's good. But I'm with the other posters, take it easy. It doesn't really sound like you had the talk. It sounds like you were just joking and having fun ... I think when you have the talk it's serious business where you both talk about how you feel about each other and where you'd like the relationship to go. What you had sounds more flirty. Just watch whether or not he actually takes down the profile. If he does that's a step in the right direction.
Personally I don't think things really get serious until people delete their profiles. Just hiding a profile means people who had previously written to you can still contact you.
Hi Donna,
I've been following the whole thread about motorcycle guy and am very happy for you. Something I have picked up in every thread about him is your "surprise" (for lack of a better word) that he still wants to see you. At first it was after the first date, and now after these other dates...
I'm just concerned because if you go in with that attitude, you're likely to miss signs/red flags. And you're likely to swallow things you shouldn't... (My girlfriend is currently going through this because of the way she sees herself even though the guy is treating her less-than-special at times.) I really want to urge you to realize that he wants to see you because you're a wonderful woman. There's nothing shocking to that. The only shocking thing would be if he didn't want to see you because he'd be losing out on a fantastic person! See what I mean?
I hope I'm not being too bold in pointing it out, but every time I read that from you it just didn't sit right and I wouldn't feel right not mentioning it...
As for the original point of your post, I think he's fishing around but as the other posters said, it's not the talk just yet. It's closer than not... I would just advise to not take your profile down until you know what's really up.
I hope this helps. And of course, keep us posted!
**edited for grammar :)
Kerry
For great info on OLD, visit http://cl-jhoover21-ivil.tripod.com/
If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting... -- Les Brown
Edited 7/17/2005 12:58 pm ET ET by cl-bklynchik
I understand about getting used to disappointment, and trying to keep your *hopes* up while lowering your *expectations*. And it CAN be surprising when you start seeing someone, who YOU want to keep seeing, AND who wants to keep seeing you too! Just because you got used to being let down and kind of wait for it to happen again because it's par for the course.
But go ahead and enjoy it, don't put too much analysis into it, just go with the flow... Try to let your feelings unfold slowly as you're still very much in the information-gathering stage. THE TALK happens in several smaller stages and it is definitely a memorable moment when you're talking face to face and you agree that you're both wanting the same type of relationship and that you're both the kind of person each other has been looking for.... Until then you're really just talking, hanging out, getting to know each other. Don't get too far ahead of yourself.
That being said, I'm very excited for you!! Sounds like you're both pretty into each other and that's a fabulous thing! :)
Hi Donna,
I don't think it was "the talk" either. That will come as you guys see more of each other I believe. Also Donna, you have to believe that you are a great person and worthy of a great relationship! Tell yourself this EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!! Wer are what we believe!
We've all been hurt in the past, but you can't let it influence *this* relationship. You have to learn from those past relationships and not do those things again, but move on and approach this new relationship with a positive feeling and an open mind to the good possibilites. Sure, there is always the possibility of being hurt still, but at least you have been brave enough to take the chance to go there!
So be proud of yourself and stand up for yourself with this guy, don't just do everything his way, but let your interests and feelings on issues be known also with him. I know you are so excited that he is into you, but try not to let it get to you so much that you lose reality and lose track of the great lady that you are. I guess what I'm trying to say is - don't just do things his way to please him, but let him like you for who you are.
I am so happy for you though and good luck Donna...
Sunshine