well, that kinda turns me off
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well, that kinda turns me off
| Tue, 07-19-2005 - 6:41pm |
The guy I've been chatting with on IM and who I like, told me he uses Adultfriendfinder now. So I decided to sign up just to see if he is there and what he put in his profile. I found out I can't view profiles without paying so that was out of the question but I did see what he's looking for and that's what turns me off. Geez, I thought he was a normal guy but those things kinda sicken me. How can anybody like those types of things?
Edited 7/19/2005 7:05 pm ET ET by dream_angel2005
Edited 7/19/2005 7:05 pm ET ET by dream_angel2005

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I think you may be getting yourself a little too deep in the initial stages before meeting, how can you really like someone that you basically had cyber sex with and who emailed you pictures of his winky.
Don't misunderstand that his intentions with you are anything more than a sexually based situation. Everytime you post I get fearful that you are going to meet one of these men and think they are in "like" with you outside of the bedroom and get seriously hurt.
Please use discretion.
Oh, I know that he's only interested in sex at this point. Whether he'll change or not, I have no clue but I'm not counting on it. His profile on CasualKiss sounded so much more normal.
In regards to the things that turned me off, he was looking for couples(man&woman or 2 women),groups, ts/tv/tg. Those things might not seem too bad to some but for me they are a little out there. He also had looking for women, which was fine with me, I only wish he didn't add more.
Edited 7/19/2005 8:35 pm ET ET by dream_angel2005
When people are looking for sex, sometimes they like to indulge in their fantasies of threesomes etc.
Disturbing for you if you were under the impression that he was looking for love. But I would figure you would know the minute he asked you if you wanted to see a naked photo of him that he was pushing your limits to see how far you'd go and that it wasn't about love.
Just be careful. You worry me a bit.
You are not alone, I was thinking the same thing! (LOL)
Of course, tv made me think of TV (television) but I would bet that is not right! (hehe)
TG is transgendered, TS is transsexual...I'm not sure what TV is, however, but I'm sure it's along the same lines.
Sheri
This is my first time on this board but I found it very interesting, as I met my fiancee online, in a chatroom.
Since I have only read 3 posts, I don't know much about the make-up of the group here yet and don't know how many have met and/or dated online or if there are any success or horror stories so please forgive my ignorance, but I would like to contribute.
First, I don't think it matters WHERE online you meet someone, there is ALWAYS a danger. I was very into chatting when I came online 7 yrs ago. According to statistics (and my own personal experiences) many, many men (especially) who chat or apply to dating services are married. A great many of them are simply looking for sex. Some are looking for trouble and one of the perks of doing it online is that it is often untraceable!! You need to be VERY careful about meeting these people. Of course, there are also very nice and honest people online, just so you know I'm not a cynic. *s*
Your feelings of being sickened by this man's "fetishes" are a HUGE red flag. Run, don't walk away from him as fast as you can. If his thoughts and preferences sicken you, you do not want to be involved in any way with this man.
OK, that said, I think that online dating is fantastic, but you must do it right. As I said, I met my fiancee in a chatroom almost 5 yrs ago. I was always very honest with the people I met online and mostly that seemed to come back to me....but not always. We chatted online and IM'd for a week, exchanging e-mails several times a day, learning everything there was to know about each other before ever speaking on the phone. The phone calls lasted another 3 weeks before we finally met in person. By that time, there wasn't anything we didn't know about each other. When the time came to meet in person (we were in different states), I asked and he gave me his full name, social security and drivers' license numbers, along with his phone number and the name and number of the hotel we would be at, which I passed on to several close friends. By the time we met, we both knew we were in love but caution was still being taken. At 2:30 am, his phone rang in the hotel room.....my friend who was in the chatroom with other friends, had called to check on me, make certain I was okay and that he was all that he had claimed to be. I was, he was and she promptly reported back to them that it was a full thumbs up!! She also said she would be checking again and did all weekend!!
As I said, that was nearly 5 years ago and we are blissfully happy and planning our wedding for the end of the year. So yes, you can find true and lasting love, maybe even your "soulmate" online, but I believe the secret is to be absolutely certain that first and foremost, you protect yourself. Second...don't believe everything you hear/read....ALWAYS, ALWAYS be skeptical....do your research about the person you want to meet. And really get to know each other. That's the biggest benefit of online dating - you can get to know a person before actually meeting but don't ever let your guard down. If they're in too much in a hurry to meet, walk away. Chances are, their mootives are only sexual or worse. Another benefit as opposed to meeting in person is that you won't be swept off your feet by someone who's one motive is to get you in the sack....it's happened to all of us, I think. Then you're left alone again, because you were the one night stand....
Sorry this is so long but I feel very strongly about internet safety for everyone, especially those looking to meet potential mates online. I speak from experience, I'm 50 y/o and have been hurt more than once but I'm not trying to burst any bubbles. I've seen a lot of people hurt and read too many horror stories of online meetings gone bad. I wish you luck in finding that special someone, but always take precautions, for your own safety. Anyone worth meeting and having a relationship with will not have a problem giving you the personal information I got from my guy! There are reasons that people hide information and they usually aren't good ones.
Much luck to you dream angel and anyone else looking for love, I hope you find your Mr or Ms Right....I did....funny thing was, I wasn't even looking and neither was he.....hmmmmmm.....
~catherine
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