Online dating??
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Online dating??
| Wed, 07-27-2005 - 3:58pm |
Can anyone let me know what to expect with online dating? I am nervous, skeptical and a little embarrassed. I don't know exactly how it works and how to make the most of it. I also don't know if it works. Please shed some light or any type of advice would be wonderful!
Thanks!!
Thanks!!

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Hi, glad you made your way over here!
I think you'd find it very helpful to do two things: read a bunch of posts on this board, as well as review the board's website:
http://members.tripod.com/cl-jhoover21-ivil/index.html
That should give you enough information to formulate some specific questions so we can help you (general posts like yours are REALLY hard to answer, I find).
Which OLD (online dating) site do you have your profile posted on?
Sheri
Ok...to me one of the most important things to know about match is that their "thanks but no thanks" email (the one that the site suggests you send if you're not interested in someone) is REALLY condescending and mean...but don't take it personally because it's auto-generated...in other words, the person sending it didn't write it.
What has been happening since you put your profile up? Have you sent or received many emails or winks?
Sheri
If you copy/paste your profile here, or are willing to share your profile name on match, lots of people here are really good at tweaking the text to best advantage.
I highly recommend taking advantage of the skills here!
How long do I wait to reply when he winks or emails me?
Is it taboo to make the first move like it can sometimes be face to face?
Are these guys looking for sex, or are they generally nice guys?
What to look for on their profile?
How long should I wait before meeting up with someone?
And is Match.com a good site to have joined?
How long do I wait to reply when he winks or emails me?
I usually respond as soon as I get it, assuming I'm interested in the guy from his profile.
Is it taboo to make the first move like it can sometimes be face to face?
I have had better luck with the guys I approach first than the ones who approach me, actually. I send a wink and they will either respond with an email or with a wink (in which case I assume they are not members and I send an email with my email address in it--assuming I'm a subscriber at the time, of course--there are several recent threads about this topic, btw).
Are these guys looking for sex, or are they generally nice guys?
Some are, some aren't (I assume you mean are they looking ONLY for sex--all guys are looking for sex, aren't they ;-)). If a guy mentions sex in his profile, it's a pretty good bet that he's primarily interested in a sexual relationship.
What to look for on their profile?
That totally depends on what you're looking for, but in general, I shy away from profiles that mention sex (see above), or that have negatives (like about their ex, or qualities they don't want in a partner).
How long should I wait before meeting up with someone?
I generally exchange a couple emails and then have a phone call in order to screen before arranging to meet for coffee (but my screening skills are pretty honed by now, so you might want to take a little longer if you're unsure whether yours are).
And is Match.com a good site to have joined?
I'm not a big fan (I really dislike some of their features) but I have met a couple good guys through it and it certainly has the biggest database.
Sheri
Edited 7/27/2005 5:12 pm ET ET by northwestwanderer
Try cut and past with that and let me know if it works
Oh, it's usually just small talk based on our respective profiles and emails. I don't have specific questions, talking on the phone is more to get a feel for the person, to see if they can carry on a decent conversation, etc.
One question I do ask in the first few emails, if the person indicates in their profile that they are divorced is, "how long has your divorce been final?"
Sheri
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