First meeting

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
First meeting
1
Fri, 07-29-2005 - 2:37am
First off, for all you that I was posting with over on the Ask Mr.Whoever, I wish you had said something about this online dating stuff. It rocks! Ya'll I have met the nicest guy! I am nervous because he seems really great, I don't want him to be tragic looking in person. He is basically your all American guy. So now I ask of all you experienced Onliners, what do I expect for my first meeting? He wants to meet up for dinner? Do I offer to pay? He already called and we talked for 80 minutes...should I back off? You guys have got to help me please. None of my friends have ever done anything like this before. Luckily, I am the first girl he has met up with too. So suggestions and anwsers? Thanks in advance!
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: lollybell9
Fri, 07-29-2005 - 10:40am

Have you already agreed to dinner? If not, I'd strongly suggest that you meet for coffee or a walk or something shorter and more casual than dinner. Many times, online and phone chemistry DOES NOT translate to real life, and before I figured that out, I had some LOOONG dinner dates where I was wishing I could go home during the salad course ;-).

There's a whole long thread from maybe a week ago about paying...I'll try to bump it up for you. Different people have different ideas, but I prefer that the guy pay for the first few dates, and I don't offer unless I WANT to pay...and if I don't want to see him again, I will insist on paying my half.

The fact that you are the first woman he's met (assuming he's being truthful) may actually be a negative...he might be, "oh, if she's so great, imagine how many OTHER great women there are on match...I have to date a bunch of them before I make any decisions to be exclusive". There's a "kid in the candy store" mentality to many newbies...he may or may not have that, but do be aware of it.

And finally, don't let your expectations get ahead of you. You haven't met the guy yet...it's fine to be excited and you should be, but don't have any expectations beyond meeting and seeing how it goes.

Sheri