No idea what i'm doing

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2006
No idea what i'm doing
3
Mon, 04-10-2006 - 3:02pm

Hello. I havent been on a date in years and years, but i have one next week with a gentleman i met online. he is 39 and i am 25. we have been talking for two months. i have no idea what to talk about on a date with him. i have a 19 month old son and havent been working or going to school or doing anything of interest to anyone. i have not seen any movies, eaten out, been to a bar, anything since way before my son was born. nor do i have hobbies (i dont even remember what my hobbies were). i have poor social skills and am pretty shy. also, what does one wear on a date? please can anyone help?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Mon, 04-10-2006 - 3:45pm

Hi and welcome to the board and to the world of online dating - often referred to as OLD!

heather 5-18-10
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-03-2004
Mon, 04-10-2006 - 6:16pm
I don't know how much help I can be but I'd like to try. I feel that I should post to you because I'm pretty much in the same boat, only it's been five kids and 12 years. First off, let me tell you that I think a lot of men would agree with your desire to stay home and be there for your child. Those are admirable qualities. Some of us are old-fashioned enough to think that children need one primary care-giver. Secondly, I realize that you've been sacrificing yourself a lot for your child's sake, but you must have had some interests, hobbies, skills, etc., before your child? That's a starting point to putting yourself out there in the world in a viable way. I admit dating is a bit daunting for me at this point. Maybe you could join a group that shares similar interests as you and develop friendships and/or a possible relationship that way? You know yourself better than I do, but I suspect you have strengths you scarcely imagine right now. You just need to give yourself permission to be them. Then a relationship will come when the time is right for you, and if it doesn't, you won't have sacrificed yourself and your integrity for some hurtful relationship. If you haven't seen the movie "Where The Heart Is" I strongly recommend that you watch it. Best to You!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Mon, 04-10-2006 - 11:07pm

First off, pick up the newspaper and read about whats happening in the world. When you meet him you can use some of the articles you are interested in for discussion.

Wear your favorite color and the outfit that flatters your figure the most.

Be confident and know you are meeting someone who is obviously interested. this is why he waited for 2 months even without one meet.
I think he is a bit too old for you but it is a good opportunity to practice.

good luck and keep us posted