That's why I put pictures up front (except on CL). I'd rather not find out that I'm "not their type" after sending a pic because it's a slap in the face almost.
Well, at some point i will do that. With my divorce not being QUITE final yet - even though my atty says dating & any of that is FINE legally in this state once we are
I'm not sure what the issue is. Just as you are not going to find all men attractive, not all men are going to find YOU attractive, and it could be for reasons that have *nothing* to do with your body type.
Not really an "issue" that i am really concerned about or anything - i guess i just wondered how many people send out their photos & then get no response, either way - was it typical. Of course, I am realizing probably most people cant comment on this issue b/c their photo is up 1st - b4 any contact is made - so attraction is ruled out - or in - right away. Thanks though!
I can understand. I have a very ex bf who done me very wrong years ago. He is very internet savvy and addicted to internet dating (he was probably one of the first in the US to post an ad on Match.com!!) Even though I've moved 5 states away and will never see him again as long as I live (if I'm lucky) I still find myself uncomfortable posting my picture in an ad. I suspect he checks to see if I'm on match, which is where we met in 2000. So I do the same as you, send out my picture and then I get one of two responses: 1) you're gorgeous, when can we go out or 2) crickets, tumbleweeds, air, crickets....
I am like you, a size 12 on my good days, a 14 on my bad days. I don't think it is our size though. My best friend's sister met a guy on matchmaker and they've been together for years. She is easily over 300 lbs, so it's not impossible. Her boyfriend is wonderful, very sincere and he adores her and her zaftig self!
I agree with Sheri, it's what they are attracted to, what they are looking for. Men can be very shallow, like women, but they are also more visual. Maybe they want someone that looks like their first wife or their 1st grade teacher, or their first date or some movie star, who knows.
Don't take it personally. You are gorgeous and will do fine. You have to get a tough hide for OLD. I'm not sure I have one yet either, hence why I responded to your post....these are things I tell myself all the time since I've been doing this off and on for quite awhile. When I get the crickets, I get a little bummed. I've recently gotten them from a guy who seems really cool, but is definitely not handsome. Oh well...
Rebecca, I am a size 6 and don't photograph nearly as well as you do. Yes, I am female, but I think you are a very attractive woman from your photos. And your daughter is adorable! As another poster pointed out, to some degree, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I work with women who are not as attractive as you or I, yet have great boyfriends/husbands.
One thing I've learned, despite what the media hype tells us, successful, long-term relati onships are NOT about youth,skinniness, and model looks. All the women I know, who are in relationships with men I wish I were with, weigh more than me and generally not as youthful and attractive.
I wish I knew what the secret ingredient is, but thus far have not been able to figure it out.
HAng in there...you seem to be a great, intelligent woman with a wonderful daughter...you will find the right person. As a divorced, childless woman of 45, I only wish I would have taken the leap and gone ahead and had a child when I could, regardless of whether I was with "Mr Right."
That's why I put pictures up front (except on CL). I'd rather not find out that I'm "not their type" after sending a pic because it's a slap in the face almost.
Well, at some point i will do that. With my divorce not being QUITE final yet - even though my atty says dating & any of that is FINE legally in this state once we are
I'm not sure what the issue is. Just as you are not going to find all men attractive, not all men are going to find YOU attractive, and it could be for reasons that have *nothing* to do with your body type.
Let it go. 5 out of 10 is nothing.
Sheri
Eh, you're too far away!
I can understand. I have a very ex bf who done me very wrong years ago. He is very internet savvy and addicted to internet dating (he was probably one of the first in the US to post an ad on Match.com!!) Even though I've moved 5 states away and will never see him again as long as I live (if I'm lucky) I still find myself uncomfortable posting my picture in an ad. I suspect he checks to see if I'm on match, which is where we met in 2000. So I do the same as you, send out my picture and then I get one of two responses: 1) you're gorgeous, when can we go out or 2) crickets, tumbleweeds, air, crickets....
I am like you, a size 12 on my good days, a 14 on my bad days. I don't think it is our size though. My best friend's sister met a guy on matchmaker and they've been together for years. She is easily over 300 lbs, so it's not impossible. Her boyfriend is wonderful, very sincere and he adores her and her zaftig self!
I agree with Sheri, it's what they are attracted to, what they are looking for. Men can be very shallow, like women, but they are also more visual. Maybe they want someone that looks like their first wife or their 1st grade teacher, or their first date or some movie star, who knows.
Don't take it personally. You are gorgeous and will do fine. You have to get a tough hide for OLD. I'm not sure I have one yet either, hence why I responded to your post....these are things I tell myself all the time since I've been doing this off and on for quite awhile. When I get the crickets, I get a little bummed. I've recently gotten them from a guy who seems really cool, but is definitely not handsome. Oh well...
Chick
Rebecca,
I am a size 6 and don't photograph nearly as well as you do. Yes, I am female, but I think you are a very attractive woman from your photos. And your daughter is adorable! As another poster pointed out, to some degree, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I work with women who are not as attractive as you or I, yet have great boyfriends/husbands.
One thing I've learned, despite what the media hype tells us, successful, long-term relati
onships are NOT about youth,skinniness, and model looks. All the women I know, who are in relationships
with men I wish I were with, weigh more than me and generally not as youthful and attractive.
I wish I knew what the secret ingredient is, but thus far have not been able to figure it out.
HAng in there...you seem to be a great, intelligent woman with a wonderful daughter...you will find the right person. As a divorced, childless woman of 45, I only wish I would have taken the leap and gone ahead and had a child when I could, regardless of whether I was with "Mr Right."