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| Mon, 04-17-2006 - 11:53pm |
Well, I am back in the OLD game. The guy I'd been seeing for 1 1/2 months, things just ended. The past two weeks he has been a bit distant. He cancelled a date b/c of work. Then he didn't call when he said he would. Then he cancelled a date b/c of family stuff. Then, again, didn't call when he said he would.
So I called him tonight, got VM, ugh! He's been so distant lately that I wasn't sure he would call back at all so I hopped in the bathtub, wouldn't you know it 5 min later he calls. So I hop out of the tub soaking wet, get the earpiece on my phone soaked so I have to switch phones . . . anyway, I said, ummm you didn't call when you said you would, what is going on? He said, I don't know. I said, you have been distant and cancelling dates, he said yeah, that isn't fair to you, is it? I said, no it isn't, it seems like you are losing interest, are you? He said, now that you mention it I guess it seems that way, I have a lot of fun when I am with you but I don't seem to have a lot of drive to make things happen when I am not with you and that isn't fair to you. I said, no it isn't. He said, I'm not usually like this, I should make more of an effort, I said no, I don't want to be with someone who has to force himself to want to be with me.
Ugh, that was one of the hardest convos I've ever had on the phone. Usually phone breakups are either so early they are entirely unemotional or I am so angry that that is all I feel, but not this time. It is all pain and hurt. Someone I spent 1 1/2 months of my life with and was really starting to care for, doesn't even think about me when I'm not around. Ouch.
Any thoughts or hugs are welcome, I could use a few right now.

Oh, HUGS sweetie!!!
From the outside corral, this definitely sounds to me like it is his issue, and not that he isn't interested in you. Men who are not interested at all, nor attracted at all will ghost pretty quickly (as in Over Night, bub bye). I think he is/was interested, but has all number of things going on including depression, fear of commitment, need to date anyone who asks, or an inability to really finally get over an ex-gf.
Do your best to not take it personally. No wait, take it personally, you were probably someone he really wanted to be with but he didn't have any stamina. Not your fault and not you. His fault and him, I'd bet ya! Be feeling the ego rush, he wanted to at least try, so that's all you and your great self!
Go forth and try again. Men are like cabs. If their light is on, and a fabulous woman like you waves from the sidewalk, that's all it takes. I'm still on the sidewalk, waving, so I know. But I keep believing in me and my allure.
Chick
Hugs to you.....the fact that you got out of the tub for the phone tells me that maybe you were trying harder than he was already. It was not meant to be with this one. Good luck and more hugs to you.
E