online relationship

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2006
online relationship
7
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 2:35pm

I am new to this board but ran across alot of helpful information but none that I saw sounded quite like my dilemma so I thought I would write my own and see if I could get some insite.

I am in an online relationship with someone who is married, I am married as well,yes a dangerous situation but one I am in nonetheless. We have been talking for about a year and over that time have become extrememly close. We have met once and it was wonderful and have plans to meet again in two months. We dont talk much about our spouses but know that we each have our issues,my problem is this.I have become very emotionally attached to him and this relationship and dont know how to proceed.We dont talk much about heavy emotions but know that we care for each other very much and have a wonderful time talking and laughing.I know that he has spoken with others online before he met me but from what I understand nothing of quite the same magnitude.My instincts are telling me this might possibly be happening again but I have no proof just small things that are making me paranoid in ways that are very surprising to me.I have never questioned anything he has done before so why now? I have no idea but its a nagging feeling and I have no idea how to proceed with these emotions. If that were the case I would be heartbroken and would not take the risk of seeing him again.I dont know what I see for the future of this relationship as I mentioned we have not talked about any deep feeling as of this time yet I know I am in deep enough to care a great deal.Any helpful thoughts or am I just crazy:)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2005
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 3:00pm

Been there, done that, and ruined my life. There is no possible way this will turn out well. Get out while you still can, and while neither of you have been caught.

Sally

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 3:13pm

You can almost always trust your gut instinct.

heather 5-18-10
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 3:27pm
Never mind...not worth it.


Edited 4/26/2006 3:30 pm ET by northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 5:45pm

Should you trust a man who is cheating on his wife? Um, no.

I'm not trying to be harsh, but why are you still married? You sound more concerned with this guy (that you've met once) than with your husband. And- you've cheated for a year and don't seem to feel guilty about it. I think it seems unfair to stay in a marriage that you are obviously not committed to. Sorry- just my opinion....

Erica

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 7:25pm
Of course you're not crazy. He's already cheating on his wife, so he's proven that he doesn't mind cheating. I wouldn't be surprised if he was talking to others online.







iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2005
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 8:12pm

I am confused...are you saying that you think that your married friend is chatting up other women? You didn't say whether or not you were intimate when you met that one time but either way you are having an emotional (at least) relationship with him when both of you are married. This is cheating but I am not here to tell you something you already know. What I am trying to say is this man is a cheater and he cheats on his wife and he will cheat on you and anyone else he comes in contact with.

You are kidding yourself here. You need to step away from this man and fix what is wrong in your marriage which will never be cured if you continue to focus on this man instead of what you need to do within your own commitment to your husband.

Please understand I am not here throwing stones because I have made my own mistakes but protect your heart and let this man go. It's easy to get attached to someone when there is something lacking in your life and you haven't done anything too horribly wrong if you use your good common sense and start making better decisions for yourself.

I wish you luck.

F

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Thu, 04-27-2006 - 12:58am
Why are you having those "nagging thoughts?"

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