How do you define "play"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2006
How do you define "play"?
4
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 1:56pm

Hello everyone -

I'm wondering if I am the most naive person in the world right now. The dating site I'm currently using (www.fastcupid.com) has boxes you select letting people know what type of relationship you are pursuing. They are:

- Long Term Relationship
- Short Term Relationship
- Friend
- Activity Parnter
- Play

At the time I was filling it out, I checked them all. So when I got an email from someone saying they had a long week and were "ready for some play" I interpreted it as just wanting to go hang out. Long story short, we had a date that went well and he said he'd call. After a few weeks I emailed wondering what was up (I know. ..I know. . .dumb dumb dumb) and he said he was just looking for "play" and didn't think my head was in the same place.

So here's my question for the group - is play code word for casual sex???

Elissa_SF

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 3:01pm

Maybe not just casual sex, but definitely not a relationship. Personally I would think of it as more as someone to just hang out with, whenever and if sex comes up, cool, no strings attached.


Curious to see what others say...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-05-2006
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 6:51pm

Oh, I definitely interpreted that as sex play. I'm still wondering what the heck an activity partner is.

However, if an otherwise very normal sounding guy checked that off, I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt until I learn what he thought it meant. Esp if he chose all five.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 8:32pm
I would say that's treading into dangerous territory. To me, if a guy is checking off all, he doesn't know what he wants or he's just looking for whatever... And
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2006
Sun, 10-08-2006 - 2:09pm

In hindsight, I guess I read "activity partner" and "play" as the same thing. Sometimes when people are new to a place, or don't have friends with the same interests - they'll post for an activity partner. Examples would be like going mountain biking, or maybe seeing a concert.

I agree on showing up to see what his intent was - I walked in not sure where he was, so when we started to put his hand on my leg and leaned in to listen, I assumed that he was interested in more than an activity partner. I was just an idiot and didn't realize he thought I was going home with him!!