Trying to stay positive but need help
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| Sat, 10-14-2006 - 7:50pm |
I have been on Match 2 months now and I have gotten a lot of emails and winks but have yet to find anyone to date. I have been told it takes time and I am trying to be patient but it can get discouraging at times. I swear the men are just recycling themselves. I get the same people I have already ignored or ghosted on contacting me over and over again while I can't seem to get to the meet point with the ones who interest me.
This week was the kicker for me. I had a dry patch for a few days so I decided to take the initiative and reach out through my own search. The response was great and I began emailing with 4 guys pretty regularly. They seemed pretty interested but I haven't heard from any of them since Wednesday. I wrote last on all so they shouldn't be waiting on me. I think we wrote enough to get to the point of taking it to the next step (phone number) but they never asked and I didn't offer. One guy we learned that I even knew his best friend (who by the way thinks I am great) but he even ghosted on me. What am I doing wrong? Is it because I don't flirt? I have been told I am a bit of mystery by a man. Maybe my profile is misleading; I am a bit settled and have a young son who is my world. Could this be a turn off? If anyone wants to check out my profile and give me advice feel free. I think I need help. I am on Match and my profile is msm217.

Your profile is really good and there's not much to change. However these thoughts ran through my mind:
What is a "low key fan restaurant"? The third photo where your head is kinda tweaked probably could be taken down. There are no full body shots. Are there a lot of guys in Richmond that have at least a Bachelor's degree? I live in Maryland and I think of Richmond as blue collar mainly. Plus, I find the east coast to have slim pickins when it comes to available, attractive, emotionally stable men. I think you're too smart and attractive for your area....lol. That's my take on your profile.
Thanks for checking me out. You may be right about not fitting in with this area. The most appealing men I have met online have been in Maryland but the distance is too far. There are areas of Richmond that are blue collar but there is also a lot of professional areas here as well. The probelem with Richmond is people settle down and marry right out of college. Those of us who didn't are somewhat left out.
I agree that I need some full body shots. I need to get some taken because I don't have my picture taken very often. I don't guess pregnancy shots would get the right reaction. :)
The one that really bums me out is the guy whose best friend knows me. His friend is married with kids; knows my family and thinks I am great. I realize this particular guy may have been a little country for me but I was open to at least seeing what may be there.
Where in Maryland? It can't be southern because I've been looking for over two years. But we probably have different taste in men...lol.
That's too bad about that guy. Who knows why people do what they do? I will never understand. But does he want children? Does it say on his profile? That can be a dealbreaker for people. It doesn't make me turn and run but maybe it does for others. At this stage of the game, the guys I meet usually have children so I'm okay with it.
He has a child (our children's birthdays are the same day) In his profile he says he is looking for someone who values children. I was probably too good for him but I am trying to be open. What really matters is someone with the same values who is good for me.
As for Maryland, Bethisda, Baltimore, and northern DC area. Really hot profiles in those areas.
Peggy
Thank you and I do appreciate the feedback. I don't think you were too critical; I really respect getting some outsiders perspective. I am going to have some friends take pictures of me tomorrow so that I have some full body shots. I don't have any right now because I am the only one taking photos. I have corresponded with people outside of my race. (again from Maryland...do you think I need to move :) )
By the way, I am not ashamed of how I look(I am a size 6) I just don't get very many photo ops.
Edited 10/14/2006 9:18 pm ET by mmsavannah
Edited 10/14/2006 9:21 pm ET by mmsavannah
I love Low Key Fan Restaurants! I'm from Richmond, and if you live there you know that the Fan is a neighborhood. And that there are plenty of college educated people there. It is the state capital, after all, and is home to 3-4 colleges.
I like the full body shot suggestion---I'll have to work on that for myself. Black is slimming, right???