what now ??
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what now ??
| Sun, 01-28-2007 - 1:56am |
I joined Match.com last week,wrote my profile and added a pretty nice photo.I then did a search and sent out a couple of e-mails ;one to a particularly nice,cute guy.
I then waited.AND waited.Nothing.
All I got were old, weird blokes ,no matches whatsoever,It all got a bit freaky for me as this was my first ever go at on line dating.So guess what I deleted my profile and my photo and thought that's the last time I ever try on line dating.
Then today I get an e-mail from the nice,cute guy !! thanking me for the e-mail I sent him but he couldn't locate my profile.Go figure !! It's not there!
He's sent me his personal e-mail address.What do I do now ??I can't write my whole profile in an e-mail.Do I keep it short and sweet? Should I wait a day or so ?
I'd like to contact him.HELP
I then waited.AND waited.Nothing.
All I got were old, weird blokes ,no matches whatsoever,It all got a bit freaky for me as this was my first ever go at on line dating.So guess what I deleted my profile and my photo and thought that's the last time I ever try on line dating.
Then today I get an e-mail from the nice,cute guy !! thanking me for the e-mail I sent him but he couldn't locate my profile.Go figure !! It's not there!
He's sent me his personal e-mail address.What do I do now ??I can't write my whole profile in an e-mail.Do I keep it short and sweet? Should I wait a day or so ?
I'd like to contact him.HELP

We all do things differently, but in your shoes, I'd put my profile back up. (At least the picture and the basic stuff.) And I'd write to him explaining I took down my profile for "editing" but it's back again. Then I'd talk to him in the match e-mail a couple of times, before giving him an alternate e-mail address. This alternate e-mail address should not be your regular e-mail or any e-mail that can "identify" you. I have a yahoo e-mail account for the purpose of OLD. (I used to have a hotmail account, but since I am doing Yahoo personals--or was, until I did exactly the same thing you did and deleted my profile--it seemed more sensible to use yahoo.)
I know exactly what you mean about only a lot of old weirdos contacting you. I seem to be irresistible to 60+ retired guys who love camping and sitting in front of the TV watching sports (I am 51 and my profile makes it clear I'm active in my profession, hate camping and sports and don't want to sit around watching TV.) I also get some attention from 20 year old boys who offer themselves as studs to the lonely older woman. (I think they believe because I mention I am a career woman I might become a sugar-mama.) It's really demoralizing.
However, the way to look at it is that you are in a big public place. In real life, all sorts of men may eye you and try to make eye-contact, and you may eye some men and try to make eye-contact. In real life, the whole thing only works when the guy you want to make eye-contact with also wants to make eye-contact with you. In OLD, the looking at profiles and sending "winks" is the equivalent of trying to make eye-contact.
One week is not nearly long enough to decide if OLD is going to work. And there are some nice guys out there. You just have to be patient and cautious and not take it too seriously or personally. (Easier said than done, I know!)
Elsa
Edited 1/28/2007 11:21 am ET by elarisa