why won't he tell me his membership is u
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| Mon, 01-29-2007 - 8:16am |
okay, so i actually met someone online and we have been dating now for a month. we speak constantly all day (via text), we speak on the phone till all hours of the evening, we both have small children, we have had two sleep overs and he has already taken me out with his friends. BUT..........we haven't discussed taking our profiles down. here is the thing, i can see he hasn't logged in in at least 2 weeks and i am pretty sure its because his membership has expired. i would like to take my profile down but i leave it up because his is up even though it isn't active.
He jokes very often with me about guys from the site calling me etc as though he is fishing for info. i am upfront. i tell him he is the only person i am seeing from that site and i also flat out told him that my membership was up. the thing is, i know his is too but he doesn't tell me! i will drop hints like "oh, my cousin is on there now, my membership is up so i cant email her profile, but i will give you her user name and you can email her" at that point he can mention he no longer has membership either...but he doesn't. its weird because i tell him upfront, i feel like he could do the same. his actions speak very loud but he won't say anything
anyone btdt and if so whats your advice.

Didn't you post about this last week?
So, you've point blank told him your side of things and he won't speak up about himself?
Have you had the conversation with him like everyone suggested you do the last time you posted exactly the same thing? That advice still stands as does the advice that men hardly ever "fish" for information.
We all told you the last time that if you want to find out if/why his profile is still up that you had to talk directly to him. And that does NOT mean having that convo over text message like the last one where you got "really hurt and upset" because he avoided the issue over text message. If you want an answer, sit down and talk face to face. It's not a big deal - you simply say, "My membership is up on X site and I don't have plans to renew it. I'm planning to take my profile down because I don't intend to start seeing anyone else and I'm not seeing anyone else but you. How do you feel about that?" You can tell him what you are doing upfront all you want to but unless you ask him what he is doing, he doesn't HAVE to answer you or volunteer any info. You are the one that is fishing here - you keep bringin up how you're not seeing others and how your membership has expired in hopes that he is just going to volunteer the same info back. Obviously that's not working. Why not try directly asking him as about 5 people suggested you do on your last post?