This Irks Me About Men on OLD Sites

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2004
This Irks Me About Men on OLD Sites
6
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 6:17pm

I get so irritated when I wink at men on Match.com (the only site I'm on) and when they respond they ask what about their profile inspired me to wink. The compliment fish can come in many forms:

"I'm always interested in what makes someone wink -- why did you?"
"What did you like about my profile that made you wink?"

Ummmmmm, can't you just be happy that I winked?! I know men don't get winked at a lot on OLD sites so why can't they just take the wink instead of asking about it. What irks me is that feels like they're fishing for a compliment or wondering what makes them marketable. I have always been turned off when men ask about winking. What about everyone else?

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 9:07pm

Hmm, no, I don't take it that way at all, and I usually ask the same type of question. If someone hasn't sent me an email saying what about me sparked their interest, I want to know. I want to know they just didn't shotgun.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 10:22pm

I don't think they're fishing for a compliment, I think they're just curious as to what caught your eye. When a guy IRL asks me out or shows interest, I ask what attracted him as well. Not looking for compliments, just want to know what he found interesting as opposed to others.


Maybe it would help to think of it as curiousity so it wouldn't irk ya? :o)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 10:24pm
Nothing to do with your post except for the phrase you used... <> I was sitting here for a minute wondering what you meant and then I got it. At first I started thinking about when you call shotgun (to get the front seat in a car) or a shotgun wedding... LOL. Maybe I'm just too tired Sheri?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2006
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 11:41pm

As a guy, I'd say that if a woman winked at me I'd be so surprised that I'd just pass out. LOL

But yeah, a guy asking "why did you wink" might very well be just trying to start a conversation with you. We're guys, after all- we're not always good at the little chit-chatty stuff.

I say cut 'em a break, be happy they emailed you back from the wink, and talk with them a bit.

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 03-07-2007 - 12:41pm

I suspect that most of the online dating sites generate Winks or their equivalent to those people who are not paid subscribers to lure them into being a paid member so that they can send/receive a message tp the Winker (who really did not send the Wink and therefore is the reason why they do not respond).\

Mark

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Wed, 03-07-2007 - 9:12pm
That used to irk me as well. Another thing that irks me is in the rare occasion that I'd be conversing with someone who had not yet shown me a picture and when pictures would finally be sent, I'd get: "Well? What do you think?" Or, "Were my pictures to your liking?" Or "Do you like?" Ugh!!! That used to annoy me to no end.












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