So what do the flowers mean???
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| Wed, 03-07-2007 - 11:01pm |
Hey,
I'm still really new to OLD and dating in general-so I'm not really sure how to read this situation. I meet "hockey dad" in early December 06 and the attraction was immediately and mutual. We met once a week for the first month. We stay in touch by way of tex messages and a few phone calls. We both have kids full time-so our time is limited. We haven't had a lot of time to get together lately-which bothers me. (he has a lot going on with the x and his kids) Were not exclusive-and I know were not there-so that's not a problem. He's getting ready to move and begin shared custody of his children-which will give him more free time.
My problem is I really like him. I feel like if I didn't initiate the tex message- phone calls or emails he wouldn't. We usually communicate everyday, but lately I feel alittle used, which is stupid, because he's not getting anything extra...you know what I mean. To be fair to myself I started dating a few new people that I've met on OLD and you know- testing the water so to speak. I'm actively dating 2 gentlemen that are very attentive and want to spend time with me. That's what I want from "hockey dad." So today I was thinking about just writing off "hockey dad" because we/he doesn't have the time to date.
So what happens next-he sends me a hug bouquet-with 6 roses-it's beautiful. The card read "thanks for being so understand." My friend said that this is his way of letting me know he's thinking of me. Is it? I don't know what it means. Should I just sit tight and wait and see? Should I wait for him to move to see if he's more available? HELP!!!All advice is welcome.

Of course you called him and expressed your heartfelt thanks, in an ungushing way, for the flowers. If not perhaps you might mention they came just as you were missing his being around and is he psychic?
To my thinking, hes recognizing he hasn't been there making the effort and is validating you have been taking up the slack. As you know having been married before, every relationship is like a see-saw when one person has time and emotional strength and maybe the other is a bit busy and down.
As for dumping him..give it some time! Keep your self in touch as you can if he is much more interesting than the new OLD meets and let him know you are there if he wants to talk, get support etc. but if he is in a mess with x and kids there isn't any way you can compete with that and you sure don't want to pressure a man who is in the middle of it. It's maybe time to just let him work thru his relationship and when he has, he knows that you are still there.
Of course if you meet mr right thru OLD-and good luck on that-well mr hocky dad has lost out.
I hear you being already connected to hockey dad and having kids in common can be a great way to begin a good relationship-whereas doing OLD you have the kids to consider with any man you meet.
If theres been no talk of being exclusive sweetie, just go for what feels right to you. Am I making sense?
Don't give hockey guy up but don't wait for him either I guess says it more clearly.
good luck and congrats on the flowers..I'm jealous!
eellee in oregon