Spoke with Carlos this week, -

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Spoke with Carlos this week, -
10
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 3:46pm

3X. & I am fine with it. I actually have suprised myself that i wasnt more emotional.


The 1st was last Sunday. We didnt talk about "us" or anything serious, just chatted about 15-20'. I decided NOT to offer him the tickets to the show that were his bday gift, & i decided to have a good girflriend go. (i did ask the pilot & he seemed thrilled & said he "needed some culture", but it was only the day b4 & he tried, but couldnt find a sitter in time - he said "But please dont let this preclude you from inviting me to something fun again").

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2001
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 4:32pm

Thanks for the update. I think he misses you and surely that must make you feel good - to a degree. I know I could not be over someone so quickly myself. However, I have also pined away for men way too long only to have them never be back in my life on a permanent basis. I think you handled it right though. If he decides he screwed up (which maybe is what he was hinting at), maybe he will come crawling back like I had hoped would happen. That is, IF he's the right guy for you. I'm not normally a hopeless romantic, but a part of me wants him to realize what he'd be losing if he doesn't beg you for another chance.

Well, anyway, I'm glad you are getting out and doing things and not waiting for the phone to ring. I like the way you have not let this man control your emotions. I wish I had a better handle on that when it comes to men. :0

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
Sat, 03-10-2007 - 1:18am
It's good to hear you managed to stay disconnected despite those touchy comments he made, and YES, I think he was fishing for some feelings out of you. That boy needs to get it together. I am SO glad you moved on. He really screwed up, and you are on to better men, at least men who say they actually WANT to commit/get married eventually....right?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2006
Sat, 03-10-2007 - 5:08pm

Um... I mean this in the nicest way, but don't kid yourself- you're jerking his chain intentionally. When you said this:

" I just said "Oh yeah, no problem. I am actually on my way to meet the person for dinner now". I was NOT about to say "meet HER". lol Let him wonder."

I immediately thought "how manipulative". That's exactly what you are doing here, if you're really giving us the scoop. Don't think we didn't notice! :)

At the ending of any relationship, there's naturally going to be some time where one or both people are missing things the way they were. Those things are gone, so it's natural to miss them. (man, I'm missing some things with my ex-gf right now, let me tell you.)

So don't harsh on the guy too much for his phone call and such. It might be that only now that you're gone he's realizing just how "into you" he was, and since you were kind of getting into him too, if you act too mean right now you could be tossing away something that would/could have been pretty awesome.

That doesn't mean you should go jump in the sack with him, but I don't think you should be intentionally messing with his head like that, either.

But he is being a bit of a weenie with the whole "how will I know if my apena is going away now that I'm alone" bit. Blah. Take care of yourself, dude! You can tell him I said that. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2005
Sun, 03-11-2007 - 9:55am

Yep, it does sound like he's really missing you, and realizing what he lost, especially since you were kind of nonchalant about talking to him, but like you said, good!

My ex (not from OLD, but my ex of a year who I was living with until 5 mos ago, emailed me, telling me how he meant to call and how was I. I said I had a lot of nice memories, but I wasn't sweating a call, and actually, to please NOT call. I am happy with my life. Single again, after the month and 1/2 OLD BF went sour. I consider these blessings, though at the time they didn't seem anything other than painful. I'm single, and very very happy. I have made a pact to myself that if a guy is bringing stress to my life, he isn't worth being in it, 'cause I feel like I deserve someone really special, and you definitely do too.

Good for you for being strong.

Gal Blondie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 03-11-2007 - 12:05pm

Well, of course he misses me!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 03-11-2007 - 12:09pm
Yes, thats a good way to describe it, disconnected. Its not that I dont want a relationship with him - but not a romantic one.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 03-11-2007 - 12:19pm

I wasnt really "jerking his chain", in my opinion - nor being manipulative. Yeah, i was being vague - but i didnt allude at all that it was a guy or a woman I was meeting. Did i do that on purpose? yes. But if i wanted to jerk his chain, I could have in a much more obvious way - on more than one occassion during the conversation.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 03-11-2007 - 12:19pm
Being strong get easier with time ... AND seeing other guys helps. lol
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2005
Sun, 03-11-2007 - 1:13pm

It sure does, doesn't it? As annoyed as I can get, thank God for online dating. It does remind you that men are like buses...

In fact, I am catching a bus today for dinner : )

Gal Blondie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 03-11-2007 - 3:44pm
ROFLMAO about the bus ...

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