My date tonight, and advice needed : )
Find a Conversation
| Sun, 03-11-2007 - 10:26pm |
Hey everyone : )
I had a date tonight, and it went well enough for a first date (I don't put a lot of stock into 1st dates with OLD since you are meeting a fresh face).
Soooo, I need some opinions. He was cute, we had fun, I went home, did not inivte him up n/c it was a 1st date, and I wanted to keep it at that. I liked him, though, and thought a second date would be fun. We ended it nicely, and I went on my merry way. Well, I'll be damned, I left my cell phone in his car and he lives 30 minutes away (ofcourse), so I emailed him to ask him if he found it, and at the end of the email, said, I had fun, left it at that.
He emailed me back, joking that if I wanted to hang out again, all I had to do was ask, rather than plant my phone in his car, but that he didn't "get the vibe that we were going to hang out again."
So my q is, do you think it's because I was so nonchalant and laid back as we ended the date, or b/c he didn't think there was chemistry? I am not going to ask him out, I emailed him back and said that losing my phone wasn't a ploy, but that I would be open to seeing him again, and I thought he was cute and fun.
Anyone have any thoughts? I guess rather than posting I could just see what he emails back, but I am too damn impatient. I will see him tomorrow when I get my phone. I need some advice, though. Don't you think the GUY should do the asking? I may not have seemed interested, but that's me sometimes. I don't get overly excited about a first date.

It has been my experience that I usually have no clue that the woman is into me or not. I get surprised to find out later that she was. If I don't get obvious signals, clues or just-plain-words that she really likes me then I move on. I say to myself, "Oh well, that was nice and thought it can develop into something but she really did not seem interested..." and I usually don't put any more energy into her and look to date another.
Mark
Wow, thanks for the insight. I am just a very laid back chick, and like I said, with online dating, I approach it with a healthy dose of skepticism. Don't get me wrong, I had fun, we had great conversations, but on a first date with OLD, I like to keep a little mystery and in my opinion, staying out really later (on a Sunday night) and/or inviting someone up just isn't doing that.
I did email him to tell him I liked him and thought he was cute....Maybe that'll swing things back in my favor.
Anyhow, thanks for responding with a male perspective : )
Crystal
Gal Blondie
Like Mark, I often don't get when she's interested in me. And I've been told by at least three or four OLD dates that they were surprised when I asked them out for a second date, so apparently I'm not only bad at READING the signals about a second date, I'm bad at SENDING them, too. :|
Anyway, you've done more than enough. Get your phone, if the guy asks you out again, thenm make your decision based on nothing more than whether or not you want to go out with him again. Each date from there should be based on the same criteria, nothing more, nothing less.
Keep it simple. :)
Thanks. I did respond to his email after I got off the phone with him, so the ball is in his court.
I dated an artist for 1 1/2 years (not from OLD) and after our first date where I grabbed him and kissed him, he still wasn't sure if I "liked" him or if it was the martinis. I, on the other hand, thought I was being pretty clear.
Crystal
Gal Blondie
Thanks! I saw him this morning (had to get my phone) and he looked even better today. He was remodeling a home and wanted to show me aorund, but I was running late for work, so I had to get going. I did email him today and tell him that he totally looked hot today, I think I have a crush, and that now that since my phone is back to work, he can certainly ask me out again :) I guess I come off as a little (ok, a lot) aloof at first, and tend to treat a first date like a hang out with a new friend. It's not like I was going to invite him hot tubbing on the first date, LOL, even though I have one.
I figured I'd give him a heads up. He's a hottie. And I do like him. 1st dates are just
trrrricky...However, he knows how I feel now!
Thanks so much for the advice. Everyone have a great night, and happy hunting: )
Gal Blondie