Not Scared of Dating, scared of ...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2004
Not Scared of Dating, scared of ...
2
Sat, 12-23-2006 - 5:38pm
I am not at all scared of dating. I am scared of developing a relationship. Every relationship I have had been in ended in "him" cheating on me one way or another ( emotional). So, I am facing the holidays and I want to been in a relationship that is deep and fullfilling. I want to be with someone I trust. The problem is that I am a little older and dont want to waste time so to speak with dating someone I know will not be around later. I need help getting over this or I will end up alone. Any suggestions.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sat, 12-23-2006 - 9:31pm

It's not easy when we want something that we don't have!...


I really don't know what to tell you, other than... keep your eyes open and be patient.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2004
Sun, 12-24-2006 - 5:33pm
I know it's hard not having what we want, sometimes things aren't meants for us when the timing is not right. You need to focus on yourself, in making sure you are fulling your needs, no one can make us complete and happy, we owe it to ourselves. I would suggest you take a break from dating and focus on yourself. It sounds like you are still hurt, maybe even having a hard time moving on, you may not be ready emotionally to date, and you need to heal from being hurt first before you can move on. Relationships take time to develop and their is no way you can be so involved and in love with someone you just meet. You may have to date several men before you meet the right one or just a few, believe me the right one will come along who will not cheat on you because all men don't cheat. Just because it is the holidays doesn't mean you have to be in a relationship to be happy and have a good time. Look at the brighter side of things, you are free to do as you please and get out an meet people to socialize with (women and men), and make the best of focusing on yourself. Would you rather be in a relationship with someone who is hurting you or be single and emotionally happy? I would much rather be single and emotionally happy. I broke up with my ex 6 months ago, glad I did, I did ask myself what was I going to do with out him during the holidays and special events, come to find out I am doing great, and think about the crap that I am no longer putting up with. I do not have a boyfriend during this holiday season and I am still happy. Being single does not change who we are. I know some people say they are lonely, I am the least bit lonely because I know what it feels like to be lonely in a relationship. I wish you well and as I mentioned earlier you need to focus on yourself because you are responsible in making yourself happy, no one can do it for you, not even a significant other.

Anna