Not Popular With Men

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2007
Not Popular With Men
5
Mon, 01-22-2007 - 8:53pm
I'm a 36 year old single white female. Have never dated much.My dating life has been even worse the last 10 years. I'm getting lonely and bored. Want to date and fall in love. But i'm scared of being hurt.Plus usally guys i like don't like me back and guys that like me i usally don't like. I tend to attract jobless losers and guys who are needy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 01-23-2007 - 11:52am

Well, would you rather be lonely and bored... or scared of being hurt?


I think that when I date, I just try to take the approach of having a good time for the moment.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 01-23-2007 - 2:43pm

shan12stones...

First...Pianoguy suggests that if you HONESTLY want to be with somebody (for just a few dates or for life)...accept the fact that the relationship MIGHT END UNHAPPILY! There are no guarantees that any couple will "click" long-term.

If you honestly ask yourself "how much networking do I do for myself" when I'm in a social environment (supermarket, church group, enrichment courses, volunteer work) and your answer is "VERY LITTLE"---this is probably the reason you're not connecting with Mr. Right?

There's a big difference between finding a person you'd truly like to spend the rest of your life with...as opposed to just "grabbing for the nearest available man!"

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2003
Wed, 01-24-2007 - 5:16am

We normally will attract the type of person that we present ourselves as....in other words, if we act like a loser, we will attract a loser, etc. I am not inferring that you are a loser, just that you need to build up your self-esteem and self-confidence.

I suggest spending time to get to know yourself and a good counselor will aid you in discovering where you came from, who you are, and where you want to go in your future.

Getting to know you prior to finding a companion is always the best path to take.




Edited 1/24/2007 5:17 am ET by mistylavender
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2007
Thu, 01-25-2007 - 2:58pm
Thanks to everyone who responded.I get guys every now and then asking me out. But they are not my type. These guys are usally ones i have known for awhile.I don't just want to go on a date to just have company or a free meal etc.Like this one friend likes me. But he is 42 years old lives with his mom. Do's not have a job and he is needy. I don't find that attractive in a guy at all. Actually i hardly want to even be friends with this person any more.I think he just wants a women when his mom passes away to take care of him. His mom still does his laundry and cooks for him.I want someone independent.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 01-25-2007 - 5:37pm
I hear ya!... someone who is independent definitely is on the top of my list!!!

Karen ~ wildlucky4me


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~