How to Handle Valentines Day???

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2005
How to Handle Valentines Day???
4
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 5:39pm

I have been dating a guy for 6 dates now. The chemistry is there, he says he likes me a lot, we've been intimate, etc. I am new at dating after being in a very long term relationship/marriage. I don't know what is expected on valentines when you are not in a committed relationship, but dating.

He hasn't brought up the valentines subject. Should I wait for him to bring it up??? Ignore it? Should I bring up a discussion about it? Do I buy him a funny card? I am feeling nervous about this.

Thanks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2005
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 6:39pm

I'm in the same situation exactly. Here's what I decided to do...

My guy likes baked goodies so I plan on baking a batch of cookies for him and putting them in a nice Valentine's tin or box. I'm going to get a nice card (nothing too mushy) and surprise him by meeting him at the train station after work and giving them to him. I'm not going to say a word about Valentines Day because I feel that this is something *I* want to do and I don't want him to feel obligated. I know he might not have anything for me but I'm ok with that.

These are just my thoughts. I wasn't going to do anything at all but decided that the best thing (for me, anyway) is do to what I want to do without any expectations. The way I see it is he'll know in the future how I do things and can act accordingly.

Good luck!

Cat
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 02-10-2007 - 1:05pm

If you haven't clearly discussed and agreed to exclusivity, then I would not say or do anything for Valentines Day unless he brings it up first.

If you *have* agreed to be exclusive (that's not clear from your post, sorry), then I would bring it up if he doesn't, because to me, once you've agreed to be exclusive, you're in a relationship, and celebrating Valentine's Day together is appropriate. Asking him, "So how do you like to celebrate Valentine's Day?" would be a good way to get the ball rolling if he hasn't said anything by, say, Sunday.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 02-12-2007 - 8:22am
I'd vote for getting a cute, light, fun card.

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2005
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 4:51pm
Thanks everyone. I sent him a funny e-card and he really liked it. I am not expecting anything from him today. We went out on Monday and he made no mention of doing something today, so I know where I stand with him. I am keeping my options open.