What is he thinking?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
What is he thinking?
13
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 2:51pm

OK I've been dating this guy for 2 months now. He came of very strong talking about love and marriage. (we're in our 40's,both divorced for many years)

He stopped calling me once last week or so ago,after a couple of days I called to see what was going on? He said he was busy with work and that he was upset because I had asked him this question "what is your definition of available?"!!! I only asked bcz he kept saying "when you are available"

Now he is doing the no calling again because I told him (very nicely) not to lay down on the floor lanes when we were bowling!!

Last time I figured it was over, he was shocked that i thought he had broken up with me and I told him to please not do that again.That if he needs space to just tell me!

I don't know what to think and I don't want to be the one calling everytime he gets insulted over petty stuff.

What's up with this guy?

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 7:02pm

Ok, you HAVE to explain--what was he doing lying down on the lanes at the bowling alley in the first place??? Was he joking around or what???

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Tue, 04-24-2007 - 11:24pm

Do you remember pee wee herman? He acts like that sometimes!!! And he isn't trying to be funny!

It was very embarressing. Besides, I didn't make a big deal out of it,when my 11 year old daughter started imitating him, I told her not to do that...the floors are dirty, etc...

Note: He stopped calling me once before that time he was talking about me being available, and I asked him what his definition of availability was????

This is plain weired to me...

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 04-25-2007 - 12:57pm

Wow. Ok, I think you need to say "next!" about this guy...seriously.

He does not sound emotionally mature in the least--and may even have more serious issues.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2006
Wed, 04-25-2007 - 9:21pm

My question was the same as one of the previous post, what was he doing on the floor ????

Kinda strange. Not a good example for the 11 year old.

Brenda
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Wed, 04-25-2007 - 11:17pm

He was trying to see how well he was doing I guess....

It looks like he was so insulted about my remark,that he still hasn't called me...This is a guy who called my mom the week before and asked for permission to marry me!!!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Wed, 04-25-2007 - 11:19pm
I agree, but why am I so upset and hurt? I don't understand myself...
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-26-2007 - 1:57am

Wasn't there a recent ex in the picture? I apologize if I'm misremembering, but if there is, then it's very possible that you're really mourning the previous relationship more than this one, which often happens with rebounds.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 1:08am

My relationship with my ex fiance ended last July. We had been together for close to two years when he basically broke up with me. I started therapy right after the break up and I'm still going weekly.

I started dating again towards the end of January.This was the second person I went out with and he came on so strong, and against my better judgement, I believed his lies,specially after he asked for my mom's phone number and called her to tell her that he was sincere about his love for me, etc....

As much as it hurts that I fell for another pathological liar and a narcisit,I'm glad this one showed his true colors in a short time. My ex fiance was a better master in deception.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 10:50am

Ok, yes, I thought so. In any event, I'm sorry you had to learn this lesson about coming on strong being a huge red flag, but it's a good lesson to have under your belt. And yes, thank goodness he showed his true colors early on. But still, it's no fun to go through this.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2006
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 4:26pm

You have to ask?


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