i need help :(
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i need help :(
| Thu, 07-05-2007 - 12:14am |
ok so i've never been good at the whole "dating game"...and i've been out of the dating sceene for over a year and a half. and the previous relationship i've had only lasted two months..and then before that i was single for four and a half years! and before that i had my first boyfriend for four and a half months...so i'm wondering how do you play hard to get while still appearing interested enough so someone will chase me. lol wow i sound pathetic! and how do you keep a guy for atleast a year or longer? please help ASAP!!

I agree. If you want to play "hard to get" or any other game then expect to get game playing in return. I think it is hard enough to create a trusting relationship without the game playing involved.
I think for any of us we need not to give up our "regular" lives for the potential partner so you won't be playing hard to get but still have a life.
Mark
Yes — game-playing to the extent that you hide your true personality is bad. But. I'm going to respectfully disagree with the earlier posters, because I think you do have to play your cards carefully in the first month or two of a relationship. I'm struggling with this right now because I just got out of a long relationship, and it's hard to get out of that relaxed mode where you say whatever you want because you know the other person so well. You can't do that with a person you've gone on one or two dates with because you don't know that person.
Most women I know who have successful, long relationships started out by keeping occupied with other things — school, friends, work, exercise — to keep from being obsessed about whether the guy's going to call. And if that's game-playing, by distracting yourself a little bit, then so be it. I don't think it's harmful to either person, and in fact it's a lot more attractive to have a life separate from a boyfriend, even when you are dating someone seriously. I also think you need to maintain some mystery in the beginning, by not telling a guy your entire life history on the first date or two. Leave him something to be curious about. And it's possible, first poster, that you just haven't met a guy who's right for a long-term relationship. I didn't until I was out of college, and that person wasn't the one I was meant to spend my life with, so don't worry too much about it.