Is he being unreasonable?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Is he being unreasonable?
7
Mon, 07-13-2009 - 12:02pm

Recently,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Mon, 07-13-2009 - 12:37pm

This guy is a control freak. How long have you been going out with him? If he freaks when you don't call him back while attending to your sick mother, he is not someone who is very caring. He wants what he wants when he wants it.

He wants you to inform him when you are with your friends? Does he have to do the same for you? If he thinks these rules only apply to you, not him, I would run, run, run from this man. This smells of someone who could potentially abuse you.

The red flags are waving really high here.

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Mon, 07-13-2009 - 4:02pm
Agree with previous poster. He's terribly insecure (and controlling), probably baggage from a previous relationship. His "rules" are ridiculous. I don't know how long you've been seeing him, but I'm thinking if you want to continue with him, there needs to be a talk about this. He doesn't own you, you do not need to report in to him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Mon, 07-13-2009 - 4:28pm
I would never be involved in a relationship where someone told me that I HAD to call & tell him my every move and where I was going & who I was going with. Now if you have a serious rel. w/ someone, even if you aren't living together, normally you do check in w/ each other & mention if you have plans. But people aren't always 100% tied to their phones. He is a jerk if he is suspicious that you are w/ a guy whenever you don't immediately answer your phone.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-13-2009 - 6:00pm

Woah, is the same guy you've posted about previously--the one who's still married?


WHY WHY WHY did you get back together with him if so????


Many, many people have told you he's bad news.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2007
Thu, 07-16-2009 - 2:00pm

This guy plainly has control issues, which, from my experience with my ex-husband, leads to abuse. The red flags are there, but just to point them out:

An abuser does the following:
1. Keeps tabs on you -- he is making you call him at certain times, and gives you rules
2. Will guilt you into meeting his demands - if you were a good girlfriend, you would do such and such. This is classic!

This is not a healthy relationship. He is controlling and it will lead to abuse.

Never give all the heart, for love...
If someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2009
Mon, 07-20-2009 - 12:22pm
If he's driving you crazy now, imagine how he'll be when you're married. WORSE.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2009
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 10:04am

Ditto what everyone else said here.

And I want to know if this is indeed the married guy. A married guy telling YOU how to behave? Boggles the mind. Whatever a boggle is...look, whatever his personal situation, this is NOT A NICE MAN.

It won't get better. There is nothing to be confused about.