The Dreaded "Exclusivity" Conversation?
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The Dreaded "Exclusivity" Conversation?
| Fri, 07-24-2009 - 4:08am |
First off, I jsut wanted to say hi to everyone. So glad I discovered that ivillage has message boards.
So I had a couple of questions about dating someone exclusively. First off, how long should you be dating

Be prepared to get a LOT of advice, all VERY different. Sort of a blessing and a curse about these boards.
Anyhoo...I think one month might be a little soon to bring it up. Seems like most people on this board average about three months...some take a little longer, some a little sooner. I think you need to examine why you need to be exclusive - are you looking to sleep together, or are you just feeling insecure?
I understand the insecure part...I mean most of us are dating to find 'someone' and when you think you may have done so, you want to confirm that NOW. You don't want to worry.
But again, I think a month is too early, and from what I understand (and that ain't much, trust me) if HE asks to be exclusive this early that's one thing, but if YOU ask to be exclusive he might bolt. I think most guys take a while to make a decision on these things.
It does seem a little soon to me too. Unless you have been seeing each other very very frequently in this month. Maybe try to think if this desire comes from your feelings about him, or more so that you are afraid to lose him because you think how long will it be until the next really compatible guy comes along.
I guess once the time comes to bring up the exclusivity thing, just maybe ask him how he thinks it is going between the two of you. lead into it that way. It may prod HIM to actually put it out there first.
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