The definition of "picky"

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
The definition of "picky"
6
Thu, 08-27-2009 - 7:22am

Whenever I hear someone say, "She's too picky, and that's why she can't find a man," I get annoyed. I happen to think we are often not "picky" enough.

So, I looked up the definition of the word "picky" (yeah, too much time on my hands here): "extremely fussy or finicky, usually over trifles." It's sort of like Jerry Seinfeld rejecting a woman because of the way she eats peas--that's picky.

On the other hand, the word "selective" means: "relating to or involving the selection of the most suitable or best qualified."

Shouldn't we be selective in who we choose as a partner/husband/wife? You know, someone "suitable or best qualified"? Otherwise, men and women could just randomly choose each other and have it work out. So, I for one am not picky--I am selective, and why shouldn't I be?

OK, I feel better now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2001
Fri, 08-28-2009 - 3:30am
Well, I have a thought on this.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2009
Fri, 08-28-2009 - 12:10pm
Thank you for the definitions. I'm totally using them next time someone accuses me of being picky, lol. Recently I've been telling people that I would rather be single than be with someone I'm not totally excited about. They've actually been supportive of that argument and have stopped labeling as picky (to my face at least) as much.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Fri, 08-28-2009 - 6:02pm

So true. In my moments of desperation I have put up with some boring guys, funny but not nice guys, guys who treated me pretty badly. I have felt rejected by guys after one date, and I wasn't all that into them, either.

My new mantra is (perhaps with the aide of antidepressants!!) if a guy doesn't totally do it for me (looks, even though I am not picky, I have some standards, sense of humor, intelligence) I am moving on. Why waste my time with someone who I know, in the end, isn't the right one, just to say I have someone?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2001
Sat, 08-29-2009 - 3:35am

"Why waste my time with someone who I know, in the end, isn't the right one, just to say I have someone?"


There's absolutely no reason, in my opinion.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2009
Mon, 08-31-2009 - 9:01pm

There's absolutely no reason, in my opinion.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2006
Wed, 09-02-2009 - 4:35pm

thanks for looking that up. For years I've been trying to justify to critical eyes why I'm not picky.