What is usually the right way?
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| Tue, 09-22-2009 - 10:04pm |
Dears Readers,
Around 2 wks ago, I posted a thread about this guy that went missing on me for 4 days after our double date with his close friend. As suggested by someone's input, I blackberry messaged him and had a very light conversation with him on the 4th day. The next 3 days, which was a weekend, he had been trying to ask me to join him and his friends. He wanted to bring me to his good friend's bday dinner, someone that I never met. But the first 2 days, I had already made plans with my friends so I told him that I cant cancel my appointments with them. On the 3rd day, he joined me and a mutual friend for lunch. He was very quiet but sweet to me. For example, he would walked with me to meet my other friends or companying me while I wait for my valet car.
At this moment, I havent talk to him for a wk. He is out of town and his blackberry message is off. Im not that close to him yet to ask him to contact me while he's abroad. We did chatted up in our blackberry message for almost 2 hrs the night before he left.
My problem is this...
I have heard before that if a man really likes you he would make plan on when the two of you will meet again. It doesnt seem like that with this guy. He's in the moment guy, though he would ask me out eventually in the weekends, but he never has a pre-planned outings with me. Maybe except on the time he asked me if I would like to join him for his good friend's bday dinner. But thats only a day before.
Do you think this as a bad sign? Or is there anything that I can do to make him plan more ahead next time?

but then there are really some guy with that kind of attitude
things would depend on you now, maybe you can talk to him.
Hm to think about it again, he actually never asked me for a date. Other than one lunch nearby my office, all he was asking were for me to hang out with him and our mutual friends (who are closer to him than me). But when we hang out in a group, our friends would make references on us. He would sometimes go along with it saying something like "yeah after this, we gonna just go the 2 of us"
In the very beginning, he asked me if I would prefer to just go out the two of us. I told him that I am fine with hanging out with the rest of his friends since I know them too. So that's how we ended up hanging out with his friends. I just knew him for about a mth now..
Does this change anything?
It's been 2 wks since he came back to town. He didn't make any contact with me.. I tried to just think of him as a ghost in the past. But, I'm having a hard time doing that.
Yesterday, I had dinner with friends. The girl that I went double-dating with was there too and she asked me if I'm still in touched with the two guys. She said that it's been a long time since she's in touch with them. She told me that I looked cute together with the missing guy. Then she got me thinking about him all over again.
I'm having a dilemma whether to contact him or not. If I do contact him, either I would face a big disappointment or I'll have a pleasant surprise. If I stick to my toes not to contact him, I'll be saved from a big disappointment. Perhaps one day (if ever), I shall meet him again in a social setting and there's a possibility that he would pursue me again.
Should I or shouldn't I contact him? If I contact him, I would make it look like it's unplanned. There's a famous cafe under his apartment and I could bring my friends over there and invite him over. I'll go by the ballots.
It's so easy to know what needs to be done when you are not emotionally involved. Like some of you feel too :s