Mr Unreliable or Mr Busy?
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Mr Unreliable or Mr Busy?
| Mon, 10-05-2009 - 7:25am |
So I've dated a guy three times in the last two months. Initially he seemed all into me, but he has been canceling on dates saying he's busy (This seems to be the story of my dating life). Two times I actually get stood up. Both times he arranges the date. The first time he texts me saying he forgot his parents were in town, the second time he just doesnt answer his phone until several hours after we were to meet, saying his phone was dead and he thought I was going to be busy. On nights leading to the plans for dates he texts me regularly and is sweet. I'm beginning to think that this guy is Mr Unreliable rather than Mr Busy and that he is probably just practicing until someone better comes along. That being said, I wonder why I had the patience for him all this while. Can anyone shed some insight as to why a guy would make so many excuses?

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Because he's a jerk.
How do you not remember that your parents are coming to town until the last minute?
How does he remember that he didn't make a date with you when he said he thought you were busy?
On the other hand...
Are you sure you are making dates with him or are you just throwing out times that might be good to get together?
Be wary of the man who texts only and never calls. I find these types use texting as a way to keep distance.
Three dates in two months? Unless he is a medical resident, no one is that busy if they are interested in being with you.
Well, if you watch Gray's Anatomy, the residents don't really have to date since they are always having sex in the on call room. lol
Really, this guy sounds like a jerk rather than being busy. I bet he was busy dating someone else. I had a kind of date (i'm not sure if there is going to be anything more than friendship) set up. I know for a fact that the guy is busy. He arranged to come for lunch to meet me at work on a certain date, which wasn't that much of a problem when he was going to cancel since I'm going to be there at work anyway. It would be a big deal if it was driving a long distance. So he postponed once and said that he is working on this project and he thought he would be done but it was going to take much longer than he thought so he pushed the lunch back a week, then I found out that the place where he was working was right near where I live, so we did end up meeting for dinner, which he planned like a week ahead of time. I guess the difference is that he's not canceling at the last minute or not answering his phone or making up some lame excuse. Since I actually met him at the place where he was working, I actually knew this was the truth. Now I might get sick of him being always busy, but I wouldn't get the feeling that he is blowing me off.
Yes, you deserve better than a guy who stands you up. "I forgot my parents were coming to town/" Yeah, right. If the parents did unexpectedly show up, then why didn't he call you and apologize that night? I think the distance is probably too much also.
He said his phone was dead AND he thought you were going to be busy?
You didn't buy it did you? Please that is such a weaseled set of excuses if I've ever heard of, errr, not one but a back up excuse as well. Seriously, girl.
Mr unreliable appears to be stringing you along. There's a definite pattern there that shows it just ain't happenin' with you two. Can you imagine if you continue to tolerate and accept that treatment (by making another plan with him) how much worse he would be later if he somehow manages to get you into a relationship with him and flakes on you repeatedly while his excuses get more elaborate. - That'll really hurt when it gets personal. You don't deserve that.. It's mediocre. Don't put up with it! If he is into you, he will be motivated to treat you much better than that.
His phone was dead and he thought you were going to be busy. OMG.. that is absurd. yeah, you were going to be busy - with HIM on a date, but he stood you up.
Don't waste your time on men like this.
Edited 10/5/2009 1:29 pm ET by sun551
www.mylifeasadate.com
www.mylifeasadate.com
Still feel awful about it. Have to keep sane and remember that it was a bad idea all along.
Well said, glammygoth, love that name!
My experience with the ones who pretend they can't remember (uh, I said it was one glass of wine, but it was really a bottle of the cheap stuff), is that's their adolescent way of squirming out of the responsibility of their actions. Cowards was the word used in GG's post. Accurate.
He knows, absolutely knows.
I asked my Toxic Man if anyone called him on that stuff. Yeah, he pretended not to really get what I was talking about.
But I know he knows.
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