Should I call or wait for him?
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| Thu, 02-12-2004 - 3:12pm |
Of course we were both a little tipsy. He lives in a town approx. 30 minutes away and I suggested and invited him to crash at my place since he shouldn't drive home, and a cab may ot pricey. I'd just drive him to his car in the morning.
So we went back to my place, talked and laughed and drank water. and kissed...a lot! I had such a good time hanging with this guy. I said he's welcome to sleep on my pullout couch, or whatever, well, needless to say, he slept in my bed, with me. he in his boxers, me in my t-shirt and undies.
nothing happened other then a bit more kissing and cuddling.
I awoke around 9 am to get water and gave him some. We slept about an hour longer somewhat close. When we woke up again around 10 we kissed, talked and laughed about all kinds of things in my bed, until 11:30! including what we would do on our first date.
my headache began to get bad and I hinted that it's time I drive him to his car.
So, I dropped him off, we exchanged numbers, never making actual plans. we parted with a kiss and that's it!
that was Sunday morning.
So - I am interested in seeing this fella again, but he hasn't called. I know it's only thursday afternoon - but how much time to I give it, and should I call him first? I haven't been in this situation in so long!

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Well, my experience has been that if a guy's really interested, he'll call within a day or two to arrange a date.
I mean, surely you're not thinking he'd start dating you at the "courtship and winning your attention" phase - you two without knowing one another slept together (no sex) and kissed, cuddled, and enjoyed the feeling of being found so desirable by someone so attractive.
I mean, the next date...if I were the guy, I expect sex. In fact, I wouldn't date you - I'd call you up and start hanging out and hooking up -but I wouldnt date you. I'd be more into the potential of a booty call with respectful limits type of thing - but I wouldn't date you.
If he doesn't call...I think it just means that he probably has interests or commitments elsewhere as far as women go and he's not in a position to pursue sex.
And if he does call, realize he probably expect sex to be somewhre on the menu immediately - probably as an appetizer.
Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com
The folks I work with say, Call him!
perhaps he's waiting for me to make the first call? Perhaps he's not an aggressive type guy...maybe he's going through the same dilemma as I am?
Maybe he's feeling like an idiot for coming OVER to my place?
I mean, I know we aren't in the 50's, 60's or even the 1990's anymore...not even 3 years ago!...things change - why should I be waiting for HIM to make the first move?
I suppose what am I looking for? well to hang out with someone, potential relationship, but not necessarily in a hurry. I liked his company, I'd like to see him again outside of alcohol related activities. and is EVERY guy out there expect sex on a date? c'mon. where are the gentlemen out there? geeeez.
"If he doesn't call, he's not interested. Period. He hasn't lost your number, he isn't too busy- he's just not interested".
Ouch! Yup, I know. So you can listen to your work friends, most likely it sounds like you will. Hey, maybe it could work out, but odds are that it won't.
Whatever happens, good luck and at least you had fun that night!
Well. I suppose I should go by the advice on this site, but everyone else I've talked to say opposite.
oh well.
I suppose i have nothing to lose anyway. if I call and he's not interested, he'll blow me off. if I don't call, and he doesn't call - he's not interested. So, either way, he wouldn't be interested.
so nothing to lose!
If I never call I'll alway wonder 'what if" you know?
Believe me I am not saying you did the wrong thing at all - you made a choice and had your priorities but I find your expectations and surprise, surprising.
Harsh????
If you call him do so only if you are ready to have sex with him very soon - my best guess is that is how he will interpret the call. Whatever year it is 1954 or 2004 - it is unusual for a woman who pursues a man in the beginning as you plan to do ends up being with a man who is sincerely interested in getting to know her as a person and being in a relationship with her.
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