Sweet dreams are made of these....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Sweet dreams are made of these....
27
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 11:19am
I hope this edit makes my post more acceptable...

He's putting the little devil dog in the kennel again this weekend. Last weekend, the dog threw a tantrum in his cage, which was quite entertaining. He whined, moaned, barked, tried to dig his way out, shook the cage, and crunched his food really loud at us. When none of that worked, he faked like he was choking. It was hilarious! Just like a bad 3-year old!


Edited 2/13/2004 7:14:00 PM ET by jilly73

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 3:13pm
I have special valentines' day plans tomorrow and I share that to put my response in context.

Please please be a little sensitive to those on this board - I have been visiting this board and other singles boards regularly and the majority of posters do not have special plans because they do not have a special someone in their lives. On the boards, among many of my friends, in my office, there has been a significant amount of sadness and sad feelings about V-day - and it is understandable and it sucks. Given the context of this board, why post about all the great things he bought you and is doing for you - why not either not share to that extent or post on a board of happy couple types?

I just had to share as one of my other ivillage friends who has special vday plans too was similarly concerned and offended by your post.

I hope you have a lovely time, I do and I hope you reconsider this post and how it may make others on this board feel. It is not that people don't want to be happy for you, it is that in this context it comes across as going overboard and even a little bit of showing off.

Thanks for listening.

Avatar for bratgirl2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 3:22pm
I personally believe that for good things to come to you, you must rejoice in wonderful things that happen for others. Therefore, I am thrilled for Jilly and Deena and only hope next year I will be having a great V-Day as well!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 3:40pm
I totally agree and still maintain that there was no need to share to the detailed extent she did and her need to share needed to be balanced against the audience here.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 3:56pm
Well, I certainly had no intention of being insensitive or OFFENDING you or anyone else here. It just seems to me that this board is always so full of people complaining and being sad that it would be nice to talk about something GOOD that happens in one's life. I, for one, would LOVE to read MORE about great romances and sweet gestures from someone's partner.

I am offended that you would feel the need to tell me I have no business posting here, and that I should go to a "happy couples board" to talk about the nice things my boyfriend is doing for me on Valentine's day. First of all, you know very well that I am a regular poster on THIS board, so naturally it is the first place I thought of coming to to share.

Next, I didn't realize that this board was only for people who want to complain or want to read about unhappiness. The "context" of this board is that it is for people who are DATING. I think I qualify, in that case. However, I note there are MARRIED people who frequently post here and some of them talk about the loving relationships they enjoy with their husbands and wives. Personally, I have no problem with happily married people posting here... it gives me HOPE and inspiration.

You are welcome to your opinion about whether my boyfriend went "overboard" or is "showing off," but his actions made me HAPPY, and that's why I wanted to share. Sorry that it upset you. If anyone else is upset by what I wrote, please feel free to let me know, and I will apologize to you.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 4:03pm

I wasn't "offended", just a little saddened and, yeah, a little jealous (and happy for you too, of course, but I am so FRIGGIN tired of Valentine's Day at this point I want to SCREAM!!!), so if you'd like to apologize to me, that would be great!


Tongue kind of in cheek but kind of not.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 4:10pm
I did not shout at you and you misinterpreted what I said to suit your own interests. I cringed when I read this post because I know there have been many posts on this and similar boards about depression/sadness around this day and I believe your post went slightly overboard with the details of all the things he is buying for you and taking you to and I would not have posted in that manner on this or other singles oriented boards. Sorry you disagree with me and I have a right to post my opinion.

Yes, it is nice to share happy times especially since it gives other people hope - what I got from your post was a tad too much detail and I believe it went overboard. Had you posted that you were happy that your bf came through for a special v-day for you and then you were asked for the details I would have felt differently.

I hope you choose not to shout next time and not to try to stop me from posting an opinion - it was not meant as a personal attack like your post seemed to be, with all the shouting.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 4:19pm
Sheri, thank you for your well wishes. I am sorry you were saddened by my post. Again, it wasn't my intention. I was feeling happy and I wanted to share it.

But as to Deena's "sensitivity" to those who are uncoupled... what about sensitivity to ME? Don't I have a right to my feelings too? So what I have a boyfriend! That does not make me immune to having my feelings hurt by someone.

And you're right, we did break up for a little while. I didn't think to post when we got back together again. I guess I should have... but then again, after Deena's post today, I guess I should keep my happiness to myself from now on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 4:23pm
I guess I'll share an example to try to explain what I mean:

I IM with a single acquaintance of mine - she is unhappily single. As of last Thursday, I had my special vday plans. She mentioned several times this week that she would spend vday with friends but didn't ask me my plans (she knows I am dating someone rather seriously but as of last Wednesday also knew I did not have plans with him yet). I chose not to tell her that he had asked me for the same reasons I explained in my post. This morning she IM'd "what are you doing for Vday" and I replied simply "I will be with J." That's it. I did not tell her specifics because she didn't ask and it likely would have bothered her if I gave her all the details about our plans and the gifts I have made, baked and purchased. That is what I mean - of course you should share that you are happily dating and that you will have a special evening but in the context of so many who do not have plans - and so many of them who wish they did - why all the details and the hearts and the screaming from the rooftop in a sense? Frankly, I would be just as happy if my plans included only cuddling on the couch with J. and exchanging thoughtful cards - the rest is lovely but not necessary and not something I would broadcast to single friends.

But that's just me. Have a great weekend!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 4:26pm
As I explained I was talking about degree of sharing not that you should not share at all. But you don't want to hear me, you just want to keep shouting. Relax, please.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Fri, 02-13-2004 - 4:28pm
I am not shouting at you. Take a moment and review a few of my previous posts... you will notice that I frequently emphasize words in all CAPS. It doesn't indicate anger or emotion.

You keep saying I went "overboard" in telling the details about my Valentine's Day. But all I did was the truth about what my boyfriend did. According to you, I should have held some of it back, huh?

Well guess what? You have accomplished your mission. This is my last time sharing happiness on this board, since it is NOT welcome. I hope you're satisfied.

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