bf vs. bf's friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
bf vs. bf's friend
2
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 2:53am
I am dating a wonderful guy(andre). the only problem is that i have connected with his room mate(matt) and i think i am falling for him. the two of us talk about a wider range of topicks then andre and i and have auctly told eachother that if i dident have a bf we would want to be with eachother. matt has also told me things that andre says when im not there consisting of how much andre cares for me and how i am one of the most wonderful things in his life. i know all of this because he also tells me to my face. i believe that matt and i care for andre so much that we dont want to hurt him by dating eachother. i am also not sure if i want my relationship with andre to end( i have a tendancy to back out of relationships to early to know what i want but i have stuck with it this time and made it a long ways). please helpe me do i stick with a relationship i worked hard not to back out of or jump into a new one?
Avatar for unsure4now
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 8:57am
Personally, I think that you should let your great guy, Andre, go- so that he can find a great girl who is 100% devoted to him- as he seems to be devoted to you. If you were totally into him, you wouldn't be contemplating anything with his roomate- no matter how compatiable he seems.

You are playing with fire here; you are possibly going to break Andre's heart and rip apart his friendship with his roomate, who sounds like a snake. What kind of friend starts making a mental move on his roomate's girl?

I don't mean to put you down personally- you are just getting an outsider's advice, that is what this board is for. To me, this whole situation is just wrong- but you're gonna do what you wanna do.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 10:21am
"please helpe me do i stick with a relationship i worked hard not to back out of or jump into a new one?"

I'll take option 3 - break up with Andre and spend some time alone.

Please do break up with Andre if this is how you feel. If you are telling his roommate you want to be w/him, then you obviously are just not that into Andre. But he is very into you. So the longer you keep seeing him, the more hurt he will be.