Dating & Anniversary?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2003
Dating & Anniversary?
2
Wed, 02-25-2004 - 11:41pm
Saturday Feb. 28 makes 3 years I have been with my boyfriend!! We are having a disagreement. I feel and have always felt that anniversaries are associated with marriage. Every year on Feb 28 we have went out to dinner or dinner and a movie. Not alot. He thinks we should go all out because its our "anniversary". I know that technically it is an anniversary. But I feel that things like that should be for marriage anniversaries. To me the real anniversaries are after marriage. He disagrees. And thinks we should go all out now and celebrate like we've been married 100 years. He's even went so far and told me that I dont care about us or what we have because I feel like anniversaries are associated with marriage. I tried telling him that being together for 3 years is very special to me. and that I'm excited more then he knows. Am I wrong for how I feel?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-26-2004 - 7:34am
You're not wrong for how you feel but I think your reaction is silly and shortsighted - why not bend a little and celebrate with him to make him happy? If what you mean is you're resentful that after three years he hasn't proposed then deal with that, or if you feel that you don't want to marry him so the anniversary seems foolish, deal with that - but why deprive him of a nice evening out?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Thu, 02-26-2004 - 9:16am
Your roles in this debate are completely reversed from the norm! Usually it's the woman who wants to celebrate every 'anniversary' - including non-anniversaries like 6 months of dating (yes, I once did expect a guy to celebrate that and was incredibly disappointed when I made him dinner and gave him a gift and he did nothing - seems foolish on my part in retrospect ;).

In any event, I think that it is very nice that your bf wants to commemorate your time together, and I don't totally understand what your objection is. I know married couples who celebrate not only their wedding anniversaries but also dating anniversaries - i.e., 4 years ago we had our first date.

Would you be okay with having a celebration but just not calling it an anniversary? Is it the word anniversary that bothers you?