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| Sun, 03-21-2004 - 3:33pm |
I met a guy while I was out with friends a couple months ago at the local bar. A little flirting,a little conversation,nothing deep-get to know ya. I have talked to him a few times since then (at the same bar)and recently he has "suggested" we get together sometime,maybe a movie or a cup of coffee. I said that would be great and I gave him my phone number. There's never been any sexual advances or even sexual talk,yet nothing to suggest he finds my company repulsive,either. He's been a perfect gentleman. We've even talked a little about my children. He's a really nice guy and I like him A LOT. Now here is the issue: I asked around and heard that he is involved with someone. But I haven't heard it directly from him. He knows that I am deffinitely interested and has even said "So I hear you have been asking about me. Find out anything interesting?" with that "amused" grin that men are annoyingly famous for :). I know I should have spoken up right away. I don't want to embarass myself by assuming one way or the other,but I think I should know for sure. If we were really good "buds" that would be a different story and certainly not something I would question. But we aren't even close to that stage. In fact,I don't even know his last name. Since he knows I have been asking around and,if he is indeed seeing someone,he would know that I am aware of that small minor detail. One would think that if he just wanted to be friends, he would have suggested a group get-together (with him and his girl)instead of a "just the two of us" kind of thing. For starters,if I were to assume that it COULD be more than he intends,it could put a strain on a beginning friendship (one that I am completely willing to accept but that men generally get squeemish about). But if I were to assume that we could never BE anything else,then I would be putting an abrupt halt to what could be a great relationship. Quite the dilemma. Also,what's proper protocol here? Would a guy ask a girl out for a one-on-one "get together" (given the current scenerio and not a cheating boyfriend)or would he generally suggest a group outing? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanx.
Edited 3/21/2004 4:35 pm ET ET by timislo

If I were in your shoes, I'd ask him if is or isn't already involved with someone. He might be offended by this question, but you can easily explain that you had heard he was involved and wanted to know the truth before pursuing any type of relationship with him.
Good luck!