How long is too long to wait to move on?
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How long is too long to wait to move on?
| Wed, 03-24-2004 - 8:43am |
Little bit of backgroud on situation. A year and a half ago met a wonderful man online,fell in love and have been seeing each other since then. He dated some real money/material doozies before he met me(along with a divorce 15yrs ago.) We are in love, but, he hasn't gone beyond saying he wants to spend the rest of our lives together. I have children that live with me, he lives alone(we live 2 blocks from each other.) I want more, live together sort of situation, what is a realistic time frame for waiting for this? He is 46 and I am 38... My friends think he should have asked some time ago and that I deserve better than 1 sleepover a month... HELP>>>>>> I need some feedback
And how do I read the replies...I'm new to this
Edited 3/24/2004 9:54 am ET ET by pigletjen8

You are both mature adults and you have been together long enough that it's definitely time to have "the talk." I'm sorry that he hasn't initiated it... that usually works out better for the woman. But it's YOUR life and your children's welfare you must consider here, so I wouldn't waste much more time on this man if he isn't willing to at least discuss the future with you. Pick a time this weekend (or as soon as possible) and start talkin'. Ask him what he wants out of this relationship. Hopefully, that will be the new starting point for you 2 to come to an agreement. Tell him what YOU want.
If what you want is marriage or to live together, that's a big step.. and you need to seriously discuss all the details BEFOREhand, especially in light of your children. Be prepared.... he might not be ready to be a parent. And you need to consider whether he would make a good parent.
Love is grand, but it ain't enough. You also want stability and commitment. Personally, I would not wait for him for more than 6 months to 1 more year.
I hope it works out for you.
And I really think you should have that talk with him. You need to know how he feels about the possibility of marrying you and sharing your children's lives, even if you're far from ready to set a date. I wish you well...