Need some insight into age difference

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2004
Need some insight into age difference
5
Thu, 03-25-2004 - 8:52am
Met a guy online who is just a really nice guy. Met for brunch and hit it off really well. He asked me out for tommorrow night and I want to get to know him better BUT..I'm 32 and he's 42. He has a 24 year old married son from a "slip up" when he was young ..lol And a 10 year old daughter he's also close to with his exwife. I think I'm attracted to him physically, frankly that first date I was so nervous that it's hard to remember..lol. I've always dated people who are 30, 31..34 maybe. Never someone 10 years older. Just seems odd to me I guess. What I do enjoy is he's grounded...the other guys I've dated in their early thirties still don't have their lives together it seems and can't concentrated on us.

I guess I just need some insight here..is the 10 years and the fact he has a son only 8 years younger than me a big deal?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
Thu, 03-25-2004 - 9:35am
Age differences don't necessarily mean that you'll have other differences. I can't remember the last time I dated someone less than 5 years older than me.

Don't worry about the 10 years. If you like him, go for it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Thu, 03-25-2004 - 10:14am
I have dated guys 10 years older than me once or twice. It never lasted long, but I don't think that was due to their age. As you get older age differences mean less. If you're 18 and dating a 28 year old - huge red flag! But at your age I don't think it's such an issue.

I have never dated anyone with kids at all, much less kids close to my age, so I'm not sure how I'd feel about that.

If you want to have children in the future, you will probably want to address that issue with him soon b/c it's possible that he's done raising kids and won't want more. Then again, maybe he does, but I'd definitely ask.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 03-25-2004 - 11:17am
I agree that 10 years is no big deal, when you're 32 and he's 42. If you like him, stop focusing on the age difference and find out and then enjoy what you have in common.

You're just starting to date this man so you don't even have to start worrying about the possibilities of a marriage. But when and if the time comes for that (long time down the road) the children are probably the biggest issue involved with a man who's 10 years older and in his 40's. You might want your own children.. he might be THROUGH raising babies, as the other poster already pointed out.

Good luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2004
Thu, 03-25-2004 - 11:33am
Thanks...I've got a six year old and am done with kids also
Avatar for macgyver17
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-25-2004 - 12:03pm
I also agree with the previous posters, 10 yrs is not that big of an age difference, especially when you are in your 30's. I am 30 and my husband is 41 and we get along great, in fact we have more similarties than we do differences. He was also married in his early 20's, but had no children wit his first wife which is a plus for me. If you really like this guy and want to go for it, then do so.