Did I do the right thing? Any advice?
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| Thu, 05-27-2004 - 4:27pm |
I have a friend "Rob", he and I have been friends for about two years. We have been hanging out, almost on a daily basis. We live in the same town and know the same people. He recently told me that he has strong feelings for me. I don't like him as more than a friend, so I told him about the way I feel for him. He told me that he was okay with that. Now where is the problem? He has a girlfriend. Lately he has been talking about breaking up with her. He always complains about her and tells me that he is unhappy with her. But it's all hot air. Because he always has an excuse for not breaking up with her, like " I'll do it after her birthday, or after the concert that we attend." It's always something. I am confused. So I told him if he has feelings for her, that he just needs to try to work it out with her. But if he doesn't then he just needs to let go. I have told him that I don't want to hang out (examples: go to the movies, go to dinner ,etc.) , because I feel it's disrespectful towards their relationship, especially if he has feelings for me. I was just following my heart by telling him that we can't hang out until he and his girlfriend get their issues resolved. Do you all think I did the right thing? I need some outside perspectives on this issue.

Pianoguy admires your directness with this man....but (deep down inside)...aren't you at least HOPING that he'll make the break with this girl? It's pretty obvious that HE could gravitate in your direction with a little encouragement from YOU! But I sense that he is "testing the emotional waters" at the moment.
If his approach (or lack of courage) bothers you....call his bluff...and tell him, "IF YOU AREN'T HAPPY---BREAK UP WITH HER! BUT DON'T KEEP SINGING THIS SAME SONG OVER AND OVER AGAIN...IT'S GETTING A LITTLE BORING!"
Pianoguy