my ex wants me back????

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
my ex wants me back????
2
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 12:12pm
My ex has been calling me and trying to get me back. we dated for 6 months and had a wonderful time together. he had come out of a very long relationship when we got together and ended breaking up with me to go back with his ex and now that didnt work out and he wants me back. I care alot about this man and had fallen in love with him but our breakup was sudden and i had found out he had cheated on me. I have let the pain go and goteen on with my life but i have a hard time trusting him now. My question is....can it be possible to trust him again and actually make it work this time?? do i givce him another chance? I have known this man for many years and we were friends first and share many friends still and we are friendly and cordial to one another now. I dont know how i feel right now. I tiold him this and he says he will make it up to me and fight hard if i give him another chance. what do you think? my friends sayt be careful and let him sweat alittle. I am doing that but i need to know if anyone has been thru something similar and have it work out?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 12:37pm

I have not been through this myself, but I have a couple of friends who have.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 1:40pm

I wouldn't go back if I were you. I am a firm believer in if things don't workout in the beginning for some reason there was a definite reason they weren't meant to.


You asked if this has happened to anyone? It has happened to all the women I know and it has never worked out. Most recently my cousin went thru this. The Christmas of 2005 I believe her boyfriend~or excuse me friends with benefits mate left her for who he believed was "the one". This guy moved in with this woman for a year and exactly eleven months later called my cousin CRYING...telling her, "I want you back! I have to have you back!" I will do whatever it takes. It took two weeks before she knew she had made a mistake.


Three months later he was back to his old ways, women we have to remember that a leopard just doesn't change their spots overnight, over a couple of months even years...especially MEN!!! They can change but it takes some good therapy and a lot of internal work that I believe they just aren't wired to do to make these changes. IMHO I believe he is lonely, horny and trying to call his next BC and that is you. His ex doesn't want him right now but maybe she will later then what? He hasn't had time to get over either one of you because he has always been with a woman~maybe he can't be alone. I know guys like that. I would tread cautiously do as your friends say do, I wouldn't have sex with him AT ALL. Or if you want to test him go ahead and post in about 3 months and let us all know how you are doing.


Oh yeah I did the go back thing too and check out my siggy and my posts at single and preggo, stillborn and here. The man I went back to left me when I was four months pregnant with his child. I had found e-mails on his computer from Match.com contacting a woman that lived in Monterey, CA to meet at a Hotel and have sex and he had made love to me three days prior with his unborn son inside of me like he was a Rabbit...sorry to sound so direct but to this day it disgusts me!!!!!


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