Dating a man with kids

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2005
Dating a man with kids
1
Mon, 03-20-2006 - 4:37pm

I have a serious relationship problem, and I need some help. The guy I have been talking to/long-distance dating for the past three years has two kids from a previous marriage. Actually, he is separated from his wife, but the divorce won't be offical until June. So yes, I did start talking to him knowing that he was married, but he assured me their relationship was over. The problem is that he has been putting his kids in front of me, and it really hurts me. Am I just being selfish? I've always dreamed of marrying a man and starting a family of my own with a clean slate. I really do think I love him. I know I should leave, but I don't know if I could live without him. If you have any advice for me, I would definitely love to hear your opinion.

Thanks, Hart

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-20-2006 - 5:49pm

Many men in your BF's position have legal and financial obligations as defined by law and court orders. If a woman honestly expects to be a man's #1 priority at all times, especially in this situation, then she needs to revisit her expectations. If you had children they would be your #1 priority as well.

This man may not be the right man for you, based on your requirements and expectations.