Not sure what to think or do

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-13-2006
Not sure what to think or do
1
Wed, 04-12-2006 - 12:59pm

Life is confusing. I recently met a guy that we really connected with. It started out as mostly a phone relationship. We talked for hours. We both had some bad things happen in our lives the last year and it seemed to give us some connection. We went out just about 6 times in person but he called me most everyday. Every other day at least. We both have kids and we decided early on to get to know each other first before meeting the kids. We thought it was best. This has went on for about 3 months and this week my kids were going to be out of town to visit family and we planned to get together. About 4 days ago we were talking on the phone for about 2 hours and he told me that he was going to put his kid to bed and call me back. He didn’t call back. I didn’t worry I figured he fell asleep with the kid. But the next day he didn’t call. Now its been 4 days and this is the longest he has went without calling me. I have tried to call and his phone seems to be off and goes right to voice mail. He had just moved out of his house and is staying with family until he finds a new place so he doesn’t have internet access or a home phone. I never did get the address. I know where he works and tried to call but its a large company that won’t let employees get calls unless its an emergency. I have a number of one of his friends that he called me from but I don’t want to call it and seem stalkerish.

It’s just not like him, something seems wrong. He seems like the type of person that would let me know if something was wrong. Nothing wrong happened during the last phone call. In fact he commented about being glad he had someone to spend time with now. I am just really confused. I have called left a message...the phone doesn’t even ring the voice mail picks up right away. I have emailed...but I know he’s not able to check it. I am just worried that maybe he was hurt or broke his phone. If he is ditching me I would like to know but I wouldn’t think he would do that. Should I call the friend? Any advice would be helpful.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 04-12-2006 - 5:09pm
Hmmm... while there's no way for me to tell you exactly what happened, I can share a personal story. I dated this guy and we were friends for about a year before we dated. HE and I dated for 3 months. We spent the evening one Saturday. It was the most awesome day we had ever spent together and things never looked better. Then, all of the sudden he stops talking to me for four days. When I finally do get ahold of him again, he says that he just wants to be friends. Then he stopped talking to me for 4 months. So long story short, people do crazy things that seem out of character for no reason all the time. Hopefully there is some explanation to why he's not calling you. However, if there isn't don't focus on the "whys" it will drive you crazy. Focus on the "he did this to me" instead. Best of luck.